OlderMother's Day Giveaway
Love your mom? Show her you care! In honor of Mother’s Day (that’s next Sunday), Just Jared is holding a very special contest with some very fabulous prizes.
PRIZES :: The grand prize winner will receive any single bouquet from ProFlowers.com (I already ordered two for my own mother. Shhh! Don’t tell her.) plus a single item from SecretSpoon.com. (The chocolate covered strawberries are to die for.) And honorable mention will get a choice of either.
HOW TO WIN :: Write a haiku about any celebrity mom (Katie, Britney, Gwyneth, Reese) or celebrity mom-to-be (Angelina, Gwen, Maggie). For those not familiar with it, a haiku is a Japanese poetic form, comprising three lines and 17 syllables in the precise 5-7-5 pattern (example below). And it doesn’t have to rime.
RULES :: Here’s all the nitty-gritty you need to know…
1) Leave your celebrity mom haiku as a comment in this entry.
2) Be sure to include a valid email address (not published) in your comment entry so I can contact the winner.
3) You may enter once everyday until the deadline: Wednesday, May 10 @ 7PM EST (that’s up to six times). The best two haikus will be chosen and notified. Good luck!
Behold the wisdom of Just Jared ::
To :: Angelina Jolie You Giggle Like Mad
We Can All Blame It On Brad
Give Birth AlreadyFrom :: Just Jared
UPDATE :: Both winners wrote about our dear Brit Brit, bless her heart. Congratulations, Lyndo! Here’s her grand prize winning entry –
Sperm overflowing.
Oops, K-Fed did it again.
Popozao, b******.
And congratulations, David! Here’s his honorable mention entry –
Brit knocked up again
girl with all [of] that money
buy clue or condom
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257 Comments
To :: Angelina Jolie You Giggle Like Mad We Can All Blame It On Brad Give Birth Already From :: Just JaredROTFLMAO
JJ…you’re the best!! Happy Mother’s Day to all mommies and mommies-to-be!!Bamz+1 rocks and rules
nice thread. Happy Mother’s Day =)
jared,Haiku usually needs some kind of a word that implies the season, LOL. Thanks for this, you are GREAT!
HEY HOT MAMA ANGIE LA BELLE,Happy MOTHER’s day to you.I love the way you cuddle MADDIE & LITTLE Z.Have a very happy MOTHER’S DAY and a very healthy and speedy delivery of the blessed new baby #3. AND Papa BRAD good job man, good job! God bless your family BAMZ+1.
TO: ANGELINABlessed is the Mother who loves the child.ANGIE you are a shinning example.let your love flow throught out.Happy MOTHER’S DAY ANGIE.
The young one can’t driveWill he make it to age 5Britney, keep Sean alive!
Halfway ’round the worldThey say you’re having a girlAngie’s lost her mind
Brit knocked up againHope K-Fed is not daddyCan’t take more than one
^ oh my… AntiBamz … if you don’t like it don’t post, angie is not the only one in the picture.. and a lot of people happen to love bamz in this site so chill, move on, leave, shut up whatever you want. And i think it’s really nice what jared is doing (the giveaway i mean) and it’s a fun contest
# 9 | AntiBamz |Do not insult an innocent child. You are flagged.
Accept this missionKate, make Tom Cruise appear straightSuri, didn’t work
Angelina’s giftBorn in the dark continentA child will arrive
Definitely a very slow news day……….WAITING IMPATIENTLY FOR PLUS ONE!KEEP ON ROCKIN BAMZ!!
DEAR ANGELINABehold my dear your most anticipated child will be born under the stars.Look away at those who are full of hatred, they will not hurt you, they are full of envy, they are wishing that it was them who were carrying and giving birth to the most anticipated baby in the world since BABY JESUS so you see my dear, it was writting in the stars that you and adorable,proud Papa Brad are going to create a beautiful human being who will be sought after, envy by some but mostly loved by many around the world.Happy Mother day my DEAR.BY the way #9 you have been reported!
# 7 | Jonathan | That’s cold…. but really funny
Katie equals momShe had a baby with TomWill her marriage bomb?
Anna Nicole SmithDrunk and pill-poppin’ everydayDrug baby on the way?
GOOD EVENING BESANE.Welcome to the thread.Your posts on the last thread were hillarioussee I told you that you crack me up , girl you are so funny keep it up it is good for the mind.Keep up the drawing thing with your daugther, I am with on that road believe me girl I know, good luck with your family.
I can’t type today!WAITING INPATIENTLY FOR PLUS ONE!!ROCK ON BAMZ………
To Angie:Your smile makes you glowand makes everyone forget your foebut waiting for this baby to pop really blows.
Thanks Jared for that lovely haiku to a very lovely mom. You are the best.
# 19 | MedullaHi there, and thanks so much for your support! :)Agh, finally everyone is in bed now… today while I was working on something my daughter painted moustache on her face with black paint and and body in red, saying she is a "Captain" something, as well as her door with the same color. it’s called "pretend play" which is supposed to be a good thing. But no bath, no amount of soap helped taking them off. As for the door, as usual, "Soft Scrub with Bleach" is my friend….
They should give away a free baby for mothers day!
To Angelina Jolie.The world will light up, the stars will shinewhen the offspring that will make history arrivesto celebrate the love they shared…
To: Angelina JolieSunny warm embraceStunning face and glowing smileTakes our breath awayFrom: another mom..
To Angelina Jolie: The special day’s near Brad and Ange, their dream fulfilled And the world rejoice!
Suri, about thatBut Katie your baby’s name does fall rather flat
some really good entrys! love this idea jared!im gonna *try*BAMZ+1 : The Belly So RipeThe World Holds Its Breath~ We Waitperfection is BAMZ
To AngelinaSunny beach at seaBlending of hearts into onePretty flowers bloom forever!
Sperm overflowing.Oops, K-Fed did it again.Popozao, *******.
"To :: Angelina JolieYou Giggle Like MadWe Can All Blame It On BradGive Birth AlreadyFrom :: Just Jared"oh JJ you are the best. How you love angelina is wonderfull. Make a contest only to show your love for her. The other mother are smoke in the eyes, i know that you don’t care about them. For you there is angelina only. She’s the best mother of the world and her unborn child the beautifull baby of the world ever. The other mother and the other children are ugly and no good mother. Only angelna is a good mother. She ’s a saint.
to AngelinaAngelina is not a saint.But full of love for people in painInspiring us with inner beauty
This is such a great idea. I’d write one about my own Mom, who I think is a star, even though nobody else knew it! So… Instead how can I not give this a stab for someone who touched so many with a loving embrace :) Happy Mother’s Day to all!To: AUDREY HEPBURNAngel Now AboveMother to World’s ChildrenEmbracing with love
TO: Angelina JolieThe world is betterFor you care much for the livesof complete strangersFrom: Karen
# 33 | konnitiwa Angelina is not a saint.But full of love for people in painSure angelina care of the people in pain for this is a saint. She’s only that care of this people. The other don’t care. They are selfish, and selfcentered. Angelina is only that adopted the children, cares of their education, makes conference, she’s the only ambassador for UN. She’s a saint because JJ said it, lainey said it, People said it and i believe them. The other mother are ugly how their children.
I wish to all the new and the waiting mamas: God bless your babies girls!To Brangelina:I wish your baby be born upon the clouds and the stars.And his/hers life to be Full of joy and happiness.My best wishes to your family.GOD BLESS BAMZ+1!!
to Gwen:You sang "Hey Baby"Now you’ve got one on the wayYou’re happy No Doubt
Jared,There is a troll on older "Jolie today’s show" thread, writing death wishes on the baby. I just flagged it….
all are very cute and sweet….Great….bye from ItalyIsabella
Brangelina’s kidMost anticipated childMost beautiful babe?
I love all the BAMZ fans. What a sweet idea.I really wish that Angelina reads this site.She and Brad should know that they are loved.Have a healthy baby!
To britney:How could you let himHit you baby one more time?I hope you’re just fat.From:meemerella
HELLO BESANE,GOOD MORNING, thanks for your response, sorry I missed it, I went to put my gang to bed instead I fell asleep before they did………LOLYou may just have a little Vangho or Picasso in your hands believe me just keep the bleach wipes handy no problem.Very slow day today eventhought we agreed about the privacy of BP & AJ being a priority, still we miss seing them in new pictures. I was just thinking since Reese’s peanut butter co. shipped a box to AJ maybe other companies will take notice and do the same since AJ & little Z both like cherrios maybe General Mills will ship them a giant box, and I hope PAMPERS and HUGGIES, Johnson & Johson baby product will all follow, it will be good PR for them, free advertisement around the world don’t you thinkBESANE?BAMZ+1 still rocks the world!
To Kat Holmes:ScientologyBrainwashed you to have Tom’s kidNow you look crazy
To Kay Young, mother of American Idol 5 contestant Ace Young:Left AI too soon.What a face! Thank you Kay YoungFor your hot son Ace.
HEY STEF MY FRIEND GOOD MORNING.Let’s wish AJ happy mother’s dayAn early happy father’s day for BPBecause the special ocasion is nearGOD BLESS BAMZ+1 FAMILY
Grier now arrived Brooke my dear keep your chin upTom Cruise is watching
Grier and SuriSame day, odd coincidenceFuture ‘Simple Life’?
Brooke and Toms babiesIronic and IconicJust grow up and play
# 44 | MedullaGood morning yourself! Good idea. I was going to invest in General Mills myself as my kids are both practically made of Cheerios. Then I read something about gluten that might cause PDD but then my son is fine so what gives? My husband just came back with my daughter who had to take Stanford-Binet this morning for her Special Ed. I managed to wipe off her moustache before she left LOL.How about some Creola company donating crayons/papers, too…
HEY BE SANE,Some creola crayons and erasable markers.Cherrios are great….I love them. About the wheat free diet I heard about it. there is a book out but I do not know much about it and I guest it depends on the individual child as well.LOL……..I read a satire where they said that little Z was bored in Namibia, nothing to do, so they gave her a Tarzan book. So some creola crayons and some construction multicolor papers will definitly come in handy with for her.
(JARED CAN THIS COUNT AS ONE?)To Angie:Why can’t I quit you?You have Brad in the desert.Why can’t I be you?Your bump now a hillAll that pain and laughing stillThat man on your armAre you a vixen?Lord of your own PR show?Or just a good mom?Your children. sublime!From two continents, like mineThey will grow up fine.I am quite normalSave the nights I cruise this siteDevouring these pix.It’s not cool I knowLoving Brad and Angie soStill you give me hope.Black and white and allThe colors of a rainbowYour family rocks!Why can’t I quit you?Someday perhaps I’ll meet youAnd we’ll be best friends
Katie, Katie…Kate.Like the babe ripped from your breast,Your empty soul cries.
ANGELINA JOLIEyour belly’s poppingbut you’re still nations trottinggood luck, you’ve got it.
This is probably not a haiku, but a little thing I made up in honor of Angie, someone I admire very much.In the dark of the night, suddenly, a spark of light.A wee little light, so tiny, but already glowing with life,In the dark of the night.Earth Mother Jolie felt the light in her, And knew it could be nothing other,Than a life created with her lover. Now the dreams they shared together,Will last forever, and ever. And the light glowed ever brighter,In the dark of the night. In the cold, and dark, of winter,Earth Mother Jolie seemed to sparkle, from the light that shone all around her.And within her, so did the light of the life grow, and glow,In the dark of the night. Then, as if awakened from a sleep,Spring brought to life the flowers, and the life that was hidden so deep.He could hear a sweet voice, a strong laugh, and sometimes, a toy with a beep.As life bloomed, and grew, from within, the love of Earth Mother Jolie grew from without,A mother’s abiding love for her child to keep. And the light glowed brighter, and brighter,In the dark of the night.
Sean Preston Fell DownLittle Girl on UltrasoundDaddy is a Clown
Moses came to earthto become apples brotherGwyneth joys in life
# 53(((((((BRAVO)))))))Six poems for six daysLeft to me you would win thisAlas I am but a fan.Thanks for that lovely tribute for a woman we all hold dear to our hearts. A woman who’s shown us that mothers come in all shape, forms and sizes. It is an honor to have a peak into this lives of this this family…..helmed by a wonderful woman, mother and being.On Behalf of all the BAMZ fans out there, thank you again.
Maggie and PeterPrego and ready to wedIndie baby time!
Britney, say it’s falseYou can’t go through this againDump that wacka now
TO Britney:Sean dropped on his headNeed second baby for spare partsHell-o shortbus.
To: Angelina JolieYou have so much nowWith Brad, Maddoz, ZaharaBe happy and smileFrom: Karen
Suri, a sad lifeRich Katie with empty eyesa gay man for your dad
jared can you delete # 62?We are all joking here but this person is taking it to far.
BRAD is whipped???Nope ANGIE is whippedResult new baby, good to goHappy Mother’s day ANGIE
To: MaggiePeter is the dadI can’t wait for Sarshaal to comeMom is her new name
here’s my attempt..surely not a haiku though.GWEN STEFANI Baby’s going to be ONE styling L.A.M.B. Singing "I ain’t no hollaback girl" while the razzis go B-A-N-A-N-A-S!
Jared, could you kindly post # 65 for tomorrow’s date? I put two poems in for the same day. Stupid, stupid me. I’m sorry Jared.
I don’t do poems………Happy Mother’s Day, Angie!KEEP ON ROCKIN BAMZ!WAITING INPATIENTLY, PLUS ONE!
To:you captivate mebefore brad, before mad didwill you adopt me?By: Inspired
To:Vicariously I live through a light They call "Angie"By: Inspired
To: katie holmesheld captive by Tomyou’re forced into slaveryEnjoy the aliensfrom: mary lis
Melania glowsBarron will swim in Trump’s ‘dough’More babies to go?
Brit, please don’t do thisYou’re becoming trailer trashBabies need good Moms
Brit knocked up againgirl with all that moneybuy clue or condom
To: Angelina JolieMommy look at me!I’m on daddy’s shoulders highHappy as can be!From: another mom ->in reference to pic of Zahara on Brad’s shoulders
To Angelina Jolie:Brave Angelinaadopting the attitudeof The World Mother
To: Angelina JolieAngelina smilesMad and Zahara are glad Brad is now their dad
To BAMZ+1 Mom: (Angie)Little Zee, Little BeeBrad & Mad Hopping GladAngie’s Hive Soon to be Five
To AngelinaAngelina Lovesmaking babies with brad dadone due any day
Who possess beauty And helps with world povertyIts Angelina
Happy Mother’s Day, Angie!OT: PLEASE VOTE FOR BRAD & ANGIE :Dhttp://www.instyle.com/instyle/poll/gdml/0,25554,1187868,00.html
# 86: Thanks for the link! Did you post it on the TOMB RAIDER 3 RUMOR THREAD?
# 86 | piyutra thanks for the link…i did vote…braddy and angie 4ever..here’s a link from one of angie’s fan’s webblog….time magazine’s illustration of angie, madd and zee…where’s braddy???http://dionisia2005.livejournal.com/60126.html
TO JARED: JARED, BECAUSE I AM SURE THERE MIGHT BE SOME COPYING OR PLAGIARISM DURING ENTRIES (DON’T MEAN TO BE A CYNIC BUT IT HAPPENS)…IF AN ENTRY WAS FIRST ENTERED AND ONE AFTER IT IS TOO SIMILAR IN CONTENT, STYLE AND OVERALL THEME, CAN YOU THEN CONSIDER THE FIRST ONE POSTED SINCE IT WOULD SEEM THAT THE ONE PRECEEDING IT WAS INDEED COPIED?FOR EXAMPLE IF ONE ENTRY IS ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUEAND THEN HOURS LATER ANOTHER ONE FROM DIFFERENT POSTER SAYS RED ROSES AND BLUE VIOLETS - IT WOULD LEAD ONE TO BELIEVE THE FIRST ONE WAS THE ORGINAL.KNOW WHAT I MEAN???
Lol anonymous- its certainly plagiarism when your second post is exactly the same as the one above it. Especially that its posted under two different names. So which post is the original? Lol… Talking about plagiarism..
TO ANGELINA:Angelina healsthis world so harsh for childrencherry blossoms bloom here
Happy familyBabies from lots of countriesJoy for miss Jolie.I hope I didn’t make mistakes because I’m french. I love your website. I’m from Paris. Kisses to everyone.
# 62 | m8 that was sick but funny…Yeah Brit needs another baby about as much as Bin Laden needs to be Secretary of State
ok here goes my satire..lolRoses are redViolets be blueAngie’s got Bradand told Jen F you!!
Way to go rude dog! That really makes me smile!
medulla post 15 you mentioned that it was written in the stars, as soon as i read it, it reminded me of one of my favourite chill out songs, it seems fitting the song is by westlife i dont know if you have had them over there, they are one of the top selling bands of all time in the UK. they are sweet irish boys!here are the lyricsits called"Written in the stars"Stay with medon’t fall asleep too soonthe angels can waitfor a momentcome real closeforget the world outsidetonight we’re aloneit’s finally you and ioooohhh…it wasnt meant to feel like thisoooohhh…not without youcause when i look at my lifehow the pieces fall into placeit just wouldn’t rhymewithout youwhen i see how my pathseem’s to end up before your facethe state of my heartthe place where we areis written in the starsdon’t be afraidi’ll be right by your sidethrough the laughter and paintogether we’re bound to flyoooohhh…i wasn’t meant to love like thisnot without youcause when i look at my lifehow the pieces fall into placeit just wouldn’t rhymewithout youwhen i see how my pathseem’s to end up before your facethe state of my heartthe place where we areis written in the starsmade a few mistakes, yeahlike sometimes we dobeen through lot of heartachebut i made it back to youcause when i look at my life (yeah)how the pieces fall into place (into place)it just wouldn’t rhymewithout you (without you)when i see how my pathseem’s to end up before your facethe state of my heartthe place where we areis written in the starslook at my lifehow the pieces fall into placeit just wouldn’t rhymewithout youwhen i see how my pathseem’s to end up before your facethe state of my heartthe place where we areis written in the starsthe state of my heartthe place where we areis written in the stars
To Kate Holmes:You’re not fooling usBut all babies are divineDump Tom right away.ORWhy the name Apple?All children are unique, Gwyn.Trying to prove what?
Kate you’re so quiet!horse tranquelizers again?Tom, hubby of the year
# 97 | The Evil HolieHey congrats on being the first clown out this morning..too bad your post is going bye bye…moron
# 97 | The Evil HolieYour mommy must be proud. You are flagged.
# 99 | Be sanethey must be a reject from the Grinch who stole Christmas with thier whoville mentality
hey rudedog,What are you doing, working on Sunday? me too… Less than two weeks before we leave to France… Turns out I’m going to Norway from Paris, too, a town named Tromso (!?). It’s beautiful out in NYC but I’m hit by alergy, so might as well stay inside and grind away…
# 97 / The evil HolieSad and Bitter day it wasWhen you came out of my loins. Ughh!What monster is this!
# 97 / The evil HolieNightmare! Nightmare! Help!What manner of child is this?Oh curses upon thy head!
# 97 / The evil HolieGet rid of the child!Send him off to the place of Hate.Where he’ll be at Home.
#94 STEFGOOD Morning STEF oh…..that is so beautiful ANGIE will love it.We wish her all the best as she & Brad wait for the arrival of the little one.Happy Mother’s Day ANGIE.
# 97 / The evil HolieOh Mistake, MistakeFueled His hate for all good thingsHow to Rid such Child?
Angie loves givingShe gave Brad three in one yearThat is mighty nice
thanks jared for deleting that post. You are the Best! =)
# 101 | Be saneyeah I work most every Sunday now because I comp actually 4 and half days for working one…pretty good deal..It’s overcast and cool down here..Went to Music Fest all weekend had a great time..http://www.memphisinmay.org/site.asp?cid=30&PID=82&title=About%20Memphis%20in%20May This is the best thing about living in this city…lol
# 97 | The Evil Holieok one more for good luckRoses and redviolet be blueAnge gave Jen the fingershe’s giving you one too….
BANZ+1 are bond togetherlike car and gas And put the Karma in your fat ass!!
ode to brit britkev’s lame it’s true butfor Sean anything you would dohere comes baby number 2Happy Mom’s Day Brit! Buckle up and beware of high chairs!
To Gwyneth:The Apple of my eyeMay lights guide you home to meThrough the Red sea
opps Sean bumped his head6 months is to young to drivewe hope he suvives
Ode to Reese:To the oscar momYour mini-me is so proudHope Ryan can deal
To: ANGELINA AND BRAD… Love came so quickly– How could you be so certain? Plus One sealed your fate!
TO: Michelle WilliamsFrom Creek to BrokebackHer life is just beginningFirst time mom, Michelle
Jared, what a great idea. Pretty original, and I love your gifts/ prizes, too. You’re cute.
For Angelina Jolie:Wild days are long goneBehold Angie’s Inner PeaceProduct of her brood
"suri," what’s it mean?katie and tom say ‘red rose’actually, "brain wash"
To: Angelina JolieSearching for so longWaiting for that one true loveBrad is your soul mate
Britney is PREGNANTThat is no Haagen Daas gutStop faking the funk
Dear Jen:Who needs kids with BradWhen you’re career is so brightWhoops! sorry ’bout that
CELEBRITY MODER LODEhttp://movies.msn.com/movies/motherlode?photoidx=2
To Angelina Jolie:Beautiful AngieSaving one child at a timeShowing love to all
TO ALL OF YOU YOUNG CELEBRITY MOMS (and Madonna, are you listening?):Please! Please! For the kids!Don’t pose with horses and whipsWhen you’re fourty-six!
The evil hole Sucked a little wormMangling, mincing and chewing itPure juice and evil brew minglingProducing a world to be famous concoctionBrangelina BamboozieeHappy Mother’s DAy, Great Mother Earth**Manufactured in the minds OF AJ ***** and her legion of low life no brainer worshippers
Roses and redviolet be blueAnge gave Jen the fingershe’s giving you one too….Roses Are RedViolets Are BlueAngie has fangs and clawsAnd yowls like a dog when she f*cksRun and f*ck with her RudedogCoz you are both from the same f$cking pack!
Out from the evil loinsof the witch joliepops a beautiful babeof pure mindkind and sincere soulgood moralswith empathy for oneand allnot caring if you area third world orphana married womanan engaged femaleLets all bow and prayFor this miracle to unfoldHappy Mother’s Day Fat Lippy Bellied Jolie!
To Gwen:She’s wearing earmuffsTo Daddy’s rockin’ concertsWhile mom holds her close
Katie Holmes is weirdTom Cruise is def scarierEw, her huge outie!
Brit’s with child againWe’re worried for young one’s healthDon’t let this one fall
To Gwen Stefani:Gwen is out to herefilled with her own little Lambsmiling ear to ear
To Angelina Jolie:Katie and Brooke’s bunsare now out of their ovensAngelina next!
Sweet little angelsWholesome and wondrous joys to beholdBorn of mothersFrom wombs so pureHearts naturally tender and lovingMinds, balanced and healthyHappy Mothers Day to Gwynniee,…Gwynnie, Britney, Madonna, REESE!!!! These lovely mummies may not be picture perfect, but they are real mummies, who do not pimp their kids for fame and publicity !
ANGELINAGLAD TO SEE YOU LAUGHYOUR GLOWING ESSENCE WE FELTGET READY…WE ARE
WOW THE HATERS & ANISTON FANS ARE HERE AGAIN. I WISH THEY ALL JUST LEAVE OR MAYBE GO TO H#LL
Roses are RedViolets are BlueAngelina is A WhoreAnd Brad is ***** whipped
Roses are redAngelina ties Brad to the bedShe whips him till he is blueThey have S&M til the baby is due
On Mr & Mrs a married Brad screwed his costarThey have wild kinky sexThey even use a crowbarHe does not care about the exAs long as Angie goes down on him in the car
Brad saw a hot chick and cannot think straightNow you see Angie is the one Jen does hateDown on Brad Angie went and swallowed she didNow they did Jenny wrong and now are having a kid.
You know what with this same person spewing hate . I MUST ADMIT I WISH ANISTON HER DEATH! I GETTING SICK & TIRED OF THESE PEOPLE ALREADY.
Maddox & ZaharaHave the coolest mom & dadAngelina & BradContinue to be fruitful and multiply
Brad came to his sensesDumped the miserables exesNow peace he has found In a beauty world renowned
Aniston is a rat and looks like one tooAngie is #1 in every beauty list the world throughBrad has finally found true loveIn his humanitarian Angie who is like a dear dove.
Angie is gorgeousAniston is a ChinBrad knows a good thingAnd gave Chin back her stupid ring!
Brad left his exTo jump into the evil holeAnd ended up looking like the pitts
# 152 | Chinny Chin Chin! LOL!!!!!
TO ALL THE HATERS!!!!:Chin wished she looked like AngieThen she’d be a real movie starBut Chin is B actress with stupid big noseWhile Angie and Brad make love under a star!
Aniston fanantic fan = Hater = EVIL and DEVIL
MANISTON IS SUCH A DRAGBOY, SHE REALLY SMELL A RAGA BIG WORTHLESS HAG!
Brad always looks hotChin definitely not!Angie is People’s most beautifulWhile Chin still most pitiful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Brad came to his sensesDumped the miserables exesNow peace he has found In a beauty world renowned # 150 | JOLIE GODDESS Brad lost his sensesWhen his lil dickie found the evil holeThe hole mangled and twisted him aroundAnd now, he looks fugly and miserable like hell
roses are redviolets are blueRUBBER-FACED ANISTON ARE SO UNTRUE
TO UGLY STINKY HOLIE:Brad looks better than your trailer mommaAnd Angie certainly better than your inbred poppaGo back to weight watchers evil chinny chin chinsBrangelina is forever while Chin is Has been!
All these beautiful, glowing content picture of celebrity mom is what Aniston missing. she better hurry up with Vince or anyone else if she want to join this mommie wagon. she’s 37 pushing 40, menopause is almost there. manopause come so early now compare with our ole granny day.
Brad fell in loveWith a fabulous single motherHe chose AngelinaTo create his family
Brad always looks hotChin definitely not!Angie is People’s most beautifulWhile Chin still most pitiful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! # 158 | Chinny Chin Chin! Brad looks like the pitted ass of the baboons of NamibiaAJ, the venomous witch bitchof Namibaba
roses are redviolets are blueManiston old egg are hard to conceive
MANISTON CANNOT COMPAREBELOVED ANGELINA…WE’RE AWARETAKE A HIKE…AS IF WE CARE
#162 MD…. YOU KNOW WHAT I AM THINKING SHE’S INFERTILE, IN SHORT BARREN & DRY. SHE MIGHT NEED A SURROGATE MOMMA. JOLIE PERHAPS?? LOL
TO UGLY STINKY HOLIE:Brad looks better than your trailer mommaAnd Angie certainly better than your inbred poppaGo back to weight watchers evil chinny chin chinsBrangelina is forever while Chin is Has been! # 161 | Chinny Chin Chin!Brad looks fuglier than your trailer mommaAnd Angie certainly eviller than your inbred poppaGo back to weight watchers evil manglie holieBrangelina is a crazy fantasy in your pitiful mind
Every man wants AngieEvery woman wants to look like JolieBrad was the only one hot enoughTo get this prize so gorgeous and tough!Aniston has not titsMosquito bites are not cuteThat chin looks like its taken too many hitsEvery time I look at Chin I just want to pukeSorry Chin you can’t look as good as JolieMaybe save on your residuals and find yourself asurgeon to make you over totally!
Roses are redViolets are blueJen eggs are hers to cherishJolie’s eggs are for all to bang
Angelina is a great momX’s movies continue to bombBrad prayed for the ultimate prizeHis prayers were answered by pretty little angel eyes.
Aniston old and dried egg + chronic smoker + too much margaritas + too much dieting + long term used of oral contraceptive + fat bf = NO BABY aka INFERTILITY = grow old with money but lonely old woman.
Frigid Ansiton should haltThe yogas, clothes, the worksand concentrate on meeting her stork
Maniston’s eggs are rotten No wonder conceiving all forgottenNo man can go fo the waitin’
TO UGLY STINKY HOLIE:Brad looks better than your trailer mommaAnd Angie certainly better than your inbred poppaGo back to weight watchers evil chinny chin chinsBrangelina is forever while Chin is Has been!# 161 | Chinny Chin Chin!Brad looks fuglier than your trailer mommaAnd Angie certainly eviller than your inbred poppaGo back to weight watchers evil manglie holieBrangelina is a crazy fantasy in your pitiful mind———————————-Typical of Chin fans incapable of being originalAs they cry and cry while Chin lives off her residualWhy plagiarize a Jolie poemCause you’re all dumber than a piece of rubber foamWeight Watchers was an hour agoPlease put down yorur ding dong for you have 75 pounds more to goStop projecting your pathetic lives on ChinShe can’t help your ass cause you’re ugly as sinAngelina is the a true beautyAccept this hard factWhile ugly b-actress Chin Looks like Jan Brady on ghetto ass Crack
ANGE’S MY ROLE MODEL AS A MOTHER SHE EXUDESTHAT AURA WE LOVE
Thanks God, Brad good sperm didn’t end up with Chin old and impending expired old egg.
OH WHERE ART THOU THE HATERS?? I GUESS THEY GAVE UP. LOL. BRANGELINA FOREVER. I WILL DEFEND BRANGELINA TO DEATH!
Yup! They are all hiding in their stinking lair! And savoring their own "CRAPola".
Roses are redViolets are blueJen eggs are old and expiring.Jolie’s eggs are fresh and for Brad good gene.
" I WILL DEFEND BRANGELINA TO DEATH!"————————Me too Cindy!!!!!!!!! LOL!
171 | Giggle giggle Jen eggs are hers to cherish…Of course, she could keep it for a life time, who need those almost expire old and rotten egg. beside she is almost 40, how many ova still left.
#162 MD…. YOU KNOW WHAT I AM THINKING SHE’S INFERTILE, IN SHORT BARREN & DRY. SHE MIGHT NEED A SURROGATE MOMMA. JOLIE PERHAPS?? LOL——————————–Nooooooooooooooooo! Jolie cannot allow her beautiful eggs to be placed in the belly of the beast (Chin).Chin will have to just settle for asking Courtney Cox. I bet Courtney said no. "Friends with money" backstab you in the end. LOL!
171 | Giggle giggleJen eggs are hers to cherish——————————–yeah, cause nobody else will..Bwahahahahahaha!!!Gucci - kudos to you too!
184 | Chinny Chin Chin!That must be odd, Vince fat sperm impregnated on C. Cox frigid uterus. well anyway. maniston is loaded.
good, I like it, ‘earth mother’.To Angelina, the earth Mother;happy mother’s day, best wishes for you and all your children,and the dad Brad.
To: AngieMy dream became realWhen Fate bought us togetherLove our familyLove: Brad……recommended haiku from Brad to Angelina
I KNOW MOTHER’S DAY IS A WEEK FROM NOW…I WISH ANGIE HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!ALSO, TO BRITNEY, GWYNETH, MADDONA & REESE. HAVE NO BAD FEELING TOWARDS THESE HOT MOMMAS. JUST FROM THE "X"
To Angelina:One Love Jah’s NationBrad Angie’s kids VibrationMama Africa
To Angelina/madonna/Gwyneth/britney & other mothers: A Blessing for all Child will make you proud and tall Rejoice! Not fall
l Smelly evil holie |BAMZ haters spit like ruttersSex obsessed and out of rubbersJen’s fans have it roughMentally inept and so stuck upGo get laid while BAMZ gets paid.You sentiments below 1st grade.
Happy Mother’s day to Angie, Madge, Gwyneth, Brit. , Reese, Kate Holmes, and other great mommie !all these woman prove one thing. being a great mom could also have a great career. LUV THEM ALL.
ANGIE:Three kids are twice as hardAs two. It sounds strangeBut–you’ll see–it’s trueOnce I too wanted lotsOf kids. Now I have threeAnd no energy.Though you can affordA ton of help, the kids willAll cry for their mom
Jen’s eggs are nice and freshEvil Holie’s eggs are rotten and foul to the core…Lets wait for the egg to hatch from the pitt hole!!!
To: Angelina 5/8/06People come and goBut Brad, Maddoz, ZaharaWill never leave you
To: Angelina 5/9/06Go and marry BradHe will love you forever,Mrs. Angie Pitt
To: Angelina 5/10/06You hate toi be huggedyou don’t trust anybodycause your dad’s a jerk
Jen’s eggs are nice and fresh in her dreams!she wakes up, sees how dry they are and she screams!Angie is gorgeous and fertile as hellIt took one Brad sperm to create baby so swell.
i am a japanese living in japan it is a great fan of brad pitt angelina-presented the family whom brad yearned for i thank angelina -thank you
I am so glad to see this day end. One of the lowest, least intelligent groups of posters ever to show up are all here tonight. Ugh. How ironic that they should ruin such an unusually lovely idea from Jared. The best thing to do is take advantage of that "abuse" option. Like someone else said, it is the equivilent of just flushing them. Hurry and get rid of them, Jared! One of the lowest, least intelligent groups ever to post all showed up on the same day…
For Angelina: Beneath desert stars Love encircles them tonight waiting for this child
BRITNEY YOU TWITWHY ARE YOU STILL WITH KEVINPOOR LITTLE SEAN P
Jen Maniston egg will be on sale, cos expiration date is almost due.
# 203 | Wu ha, ha,haI’ll give 50 cent…oh yeah he’s a rapper and a bad one at that…Ok 51 cent….
# 128 | Floral BouquetThank you that’s actually a compliment!!! What’s wrong hubby can’t make you scream anymore??? Come see the "dog" and I’ll fix your pipes…No claws needed..Of course first you will need to drop about 50 lbs and then find the fountain of youth or come up with some serious cash, because the dog don’t "do" fossils for free..
Come on people let’s get back to wishing "THE MOTHERS" a very happy Mother’s Day because they deserve it and please let’s just leave Maniston chin chin out of this league because she does not belong here! She does not have the UTERUS for it yet!As for Maniston fans please stop attacking ANGIE she deserve to have a Happy Mother’s Day, she became a Mother at age 26 and has matured ever since, Maniston is almost 40 and does know what it is like to be a MOM, she is really missing out a lot , so Maniston’s fan instead of throwing cheap shots at ANGIE for finaly making BRAD’s wish to have a baby come through , encourage your idol to try motherwood it is a great titlle , it changes people for the better and it keeps your husband around as well.
Typo people typo on my post 206I meant to say MOTHERHOOD!HI LADY STEF, have a wonderful day my dear.
to katie:pregnant way-too-linghad a silent, secret birthnow, a zombie mom
She’s a *****-Handicapped kid-Stillborn baby—You’re flagged, *******.
# 209 | She’s a ***** # 210 | Handicapped kid # 211 | Stillborn baby OMG!!! YOU ARE SO SICK AND DISGUSTING!!!
PEOPLE!Jared thought of a nice contest to HONOR MOTHERS, you know, those wonderful human beings who gave all of us our lives. And you allowed this thread to degenerate into a juvenile name-calling, grammar school playground — and these people who have nothing better to do than wish an innocent baby harm. HOW COULD YOU?Man, people are truly truly sick in the head!!!!
Quickly Angi, hurry We really want to see BradGiggle just like thee
Michelle, your soul bloomedWith a child of love …and HeathWants a dozen more!
TO: Reese WitherspoonAva and DeaconShe’s just trying to matterShe’s legally mom
To Gwen Stefani:You’re still lookin’ goodYour belly’s bananas, butLay off the saris
Britney gave birth to Seanand is said to be carrying another spawn.Get on birth control girl!
Britney gave birth to Seanand is said to be carrying another spawn.Get on birth control girl!
To Gwen Stefani:Your a little lambAbout to have your own lambNO DOUBT you’ll be great!
For Angelina Jolie:Lips like soft petalsEyes clear like Namibian skyMother Jolie blooms
Brit Brit is preggersPoor Sean P is on floor hurtThey’re Hollywood trash
Suri is an alienKate has been now brainwashedTomkat is a farce
You once were so hotBut there’s no chance for cute kidswhen k-feds the dad
You once were so hotBut there’s no chance for cute kidswhen k-feds the dad
To Brit:When you think it’s safeSean falls out of his high chairshe’s knocked up again.
To: Angelina JolieAngels on the sandLittle angels in your wombAngels in your dreams.
Britney Please run fastKevin is stoned once againSean P cries like hell
Katie looks good now. Still sad though. Gwen Stefani pregnant forever. Is Britney preggers? And Rachel Weisz still pregggers - geez!!!
Brad’s Angel With BroodLet Your Jolie Wings Fly ToBAMZ’ Calm Desert Sky
Jared FYI: #222 is for Angelina Jolie.
Zahara is too cute. So is Reese’s son. How about Cindy Crawford? Also Jared any pics of Shaquille O’neal’s babies? he had a baby this past week.
Roses for MosesPeaches for AppleGwyneth is MrsAnd Chris is a Dad
Brooke’s baby is cuter than Suri I am sureCause Katie is not too cuteespecially brainwashedTom leave Katie aloneShe can think for herselfYou crazy little elf
I’m just gonna keep tryin’…day 3: ANGELINA Found–the perfect dad For your clan, begun with Madd– What great luck you had!
katie kate spacemonsters of the mind seize youfree your child
Britney oh spearslance your star crashing downforever trailer park
vacant, vapid Kateoh no! child bearing womanit’s late, save yourself
Apple, Moses - namesFrom the Old Testament. (Well,In a way, Gwyneth.)
Reese, cute as can be.Two kids, career, hot hubby.Reese for Pres ‘08!
TO: Britney SpearsBaby One More Time?Someday I Will Understandwhy she’s so Crazy
To Gwen:Harijuku MomYou got the life you wantedSimple kind of life
To Britney Spears:Kevin Federlinesires apocalyptic spawnold Britney is gone
To Katie Holmes & Brooke Shields:Suri and Griernothing is clearer to usFuture tabloid fun
To Kate Holmes:Kate Holmes and Tom Cruisebaby alien from spacethe spawn of Xenu
To GwenythToo good for L.A.But where the hell else could youdamn your kids through name
To who? Guess:Lady MadonnaKids at your feet learn the beatto manage make ends meet
ANGELINA…Her efforts are boundlessHer generosity without greedFor what she inspiresA generation should heedFor once we have heroesthose willing to fight…to save those in painShe shows us their plightOur Most Beautiful WomanOur attention is drawn, forHer hopes for her childrenAre also For those not yet borne…
ANGIE:You know what to do:Ignore gossip, the press, us.Raise kids; change the world.
Hey "Addicted," I like your haiku in #227. Keep ‘em coming. Maybe Jared will have to hire a PhD in poetry to judge the contest if we keep getting better.This Haiku contest is fun and challenging. Psychos, and you know who you are, please stop slinging hateful language. Any idiot can write adolescent smut. For those of you stuck in adolescence, please go elsewhere. Find a bathroom wall. No, wait, don’t do that, just go.Jared, find another form of poetry you like and let’s do this again; maybe after we see the first BAMZ+1 family picture. I don’t think limericks are safe with this crowd, though.Un beso,Peggypamblue, sleepless in America
To Gwen Stefani:you will always glownow more than ever, yorock steady baby
To Gwen:you will always glownow much* more than ever, yorock steady baby*missed a word :/
For Angelina Jolie:Angie Branded WildJolie Docile In Brad’s ArmsTamed Angel With Child
So many celeb babies!Hollywood is very fertile I seeBut Brooke has two really pretty
To Britney Spears:Your smile is beautyMother of the year, you are notGet rid of K.FedFrom: Jocey
Mommy Dearest, Joan, Enjoy the flowers in thepsychiatric ward.
For Angelina and Brad:The moment you metgreat passion was ignitedfueled by love for Madd.Hey, peggypamblue, I loved YOURS! Good luck!
To Britney:Sean fell down, went boomBut you weren’t in the roomHard to find good help?
To: BritneyKevin FederlineSo many white trash babiesStop the madness, Brit!
TO: Teri HatcherSingle and strong-willedGiving guidance with Burnt ToastShe’s no mere Housewife
So far I’ve posted these (with minor corrections):1. To Angelina:Little Zee, Little Bee,Brand & Mad Hopping Glad,Angie’s Hive soon to be Five.2. To Gwyneth:The Apple of my eye,May Light Bring you Home To Me,Through the Deep RED Sea.3. To Madonna:Lady Madonna,Kids at your feet learn the beat,So they make ends meet.These are my fav celebrity moms.Cheers,Agnieszka
A typo above:Brand=BRADSorry.
To all of the pregnant celebs:he’s still in the wombbut your kid will surely besaner than Suri
to all of the pregnant celebs:he’s still in the wombbut your kid will surely besaner than Suri
To BritHey baby babiesBrought into this crazy worldShe has some maybiesand to KatieLily white dress you wearSuri for MuriYou won’t even share a tear
BritneyStole Shar’s babies’ daddoes he even know his kidsyou helped steal childhood
To Mary Louise ParkerBilly went for ClaireWho? Yeah we all feel the sameYou got Weeds…they got ?
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