Brad and Angelina In & Out of India

That’s funny

OT

The Forbes Fictional 15
Michael Noer and David M. Ewalt 11.20.06, 2:00 PM ET

The rich may be different than you and me–but not nearly as different as the characters that comprise the Forbes Fictional 15, our annual listing of fiction’s very wealthiest. This year’s selection includes a duck, a wizard, a Nigerian prince and even a plumber. Aggregate (fictional) net worth? $111 billion.

The biggest change to this year’s list comes at the very top. For the first time in the Fictional 15’s history, Santa Claus has been unseated from the number-one spot, replaced by defense contractor Oliver ”Daddy” Warbucks.

We still estimate Claus’ net worth as infinite, but we excluded him from this year’s rankings after being bombarded by letters from outraged children insisting that Claus is “real.” We don’t claim to have settled the ongoing controversy concerning Claus’ existence, but after taking into account the physical evidence–toys delivered, milk and cookies devoured–we felt it was safer to remove him from consideration.

In the absence of the tubby toy titan, Oliver Warbucks now reigns as the world’s richest fictional character. The ex-U.S. Army general turned industrialist saw his net worth surge to $36.2 billion, thanks to the ongoing conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan and because of a contract to provide oil-well maintenance in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge.

Other characters were dropped for more prosaic reasons. Plummeting demand for fur coats hit puppy-hating Cruella De Vil especially hard, while playboy billionaire Arthur Bach died from liver failure. Ebenezer Scrooge gave the bulk of his $1.7 billion fortune to the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation. And Superman nemesis Lex Luthor is struggling to rebuild his fortune after blowing billions on his latest (futile) attempt to take over the world.

With a net worth of $7.1 billion, Atlantic City real-estate tycoon Mr. Monopoly is the richest newcomer. Also making his Fictional 15 debut: spam entrepreneur Prince Abakaliki of Nigeria. Abakaliki is notable for being the only fictional character on our list who regularly e-mails real people, usually begging for assistance in recovering large sums of money. We estimate Abakaliki to be worth more than $2.8 billion.

Characters involved in the defense industries, or whose fortune is determined by the price of gold, have done particularly well over the past 12 months. Fictional 15 newcomer Tony Stark (net worth: $3 billion) has profited immensely from his firm’s invention of indestructible alloys and so-called “destructor rays.” And despite a failed scheme to find “the gold at the end of the rainbow,” the planet’s richest poultry, Scrooge McDuck, saw his fortune soar to an estimated $10.9 billion on rising gold prices.

Other newcomers include Mario, the videogame plumber who built a $1 billion fortune after decades of collecting gold coins, and billionaire narcocapitalist Tony Montana, aka Scarface.

The wheel of fortune has a tendency to turn especially fast for the members of the Fictional 15, and this year proved no exception. Longtime member C. Montgomery Burns doubled his fortune to $16.8 billion in just 12 months, thanks in large part to a “technology exchange” deal with North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il.

Others have been less fortunate. Willy Wonka ran afoul of British occupational safety authorities with his eccentric “golden ticket” method of CEO succession planning. Richie Rich blew more than $6 billion over the last year building solid-gold schoolhouses in Indonesia. And Thurston Howell III’s fortune has taken a hit after a mysterious whistleblower, known only as “Gilligan,” began cooperating with the New York State attorney general.

A note on methodology: Net worth estimates are based, when possible, on known commodity and share price movements. All prices as of market close, Nov. 17, 2006. In the case of privately held fictional concerns, we sought to identify comparable fictional public companies. Final net worths were calculated using a tiny grain of common sense and a large dose of salt.

The Fictional 15
Oliver “Daddy” Warbucks
Montgomery Burns
Scrooge McDuck
Richie Rich
Jed Clampett
Mr. Monopoly
Bruce Wayne
Tony Stark
Prince Abakaliki of Nigeria
Thurston Howell III
Willy Wonka
Lucius Malfoy
Tony Montana
Lara Croft
Mario

Girl Jackie O probably wished she had a fro

Angie is pregnant with love and the gift of sharing! She constantly gives birth to both of those everywhere she goes!

gitane:

Actually, yes they are qualified to adopt from India. Or Angelina is at least. Singles can adopt from India. Now, Brad would not be listed as a parent. After Angelina had full custody of the child, Brad would have to petition the California state government to adopt the child. Just as he did with Maddox and Zahara. I have plans to adopt internationally someday and so have looked into several agencies and countries. I have yet to find a country that will let an unmarried couple adopt as a couple. One of the individuals would have to adopt as a single with the other adopting domestically once the child became a U.S. citizen. I think that’s exactly what they had planned when Angelina adopted Z.

babyface Says:

November 22nd, 2006 at 10:56 am
I understand they write this kind of history to please Aniston fans.( because, really, there is nothing going on in her silly life). But it’s so disrespectful! especially because is not only Brad and Angie, they have young kids. I don’t know, I just don’t understand why adults would like to read about the end of a family

I think it is the height of irresponsibility for the tabloids to carry on like this in order to make money. They don’t care about the damage they do to this family and I think people should boycott these tabloids.

I want to post on the jen post but jj he have not put one. Is been a long time I come on jj, the site have been having a lot of problem. I was thinking maybe jj he don’t want me to post anymore because everybody they always say chica go away. I tell that to my brother and he get angry and tell me maybe I should keep try to get on jj. If it don’t work, he will write email to jj and ask him why he not let me post but now it is working. I think jj he have fixed it. I will not write any bad thing on the babies and brad and angie. My friend her name is ajp, she always anser me the questions I ask and she know I will not write bad thing on anybody.

i know. i know. but it’s too funny!

Hilton Vomits While Attempting To Sing Own Song

Paris Hilton shocked revelers at a Las Vegas nightclub when she got up to perform but ended up vomiting on stage instead. Singer Joshua Radin was among the guests who went to a nightclub to hear rapper Shawn ‘Jay-Z’ Carter perform and found himself sitting next to the socialite-turned-singer. Radin writes on his MySpace page, “Paris Hilton was sitting next to me the whole night. Seriously, next to me, like our legs were touching for a good five hours. Now don’t get the wrong idea. She never once said hello, nor even looked in my direction. Five hours. And it was unreal to watch. She must have pulled a compact out of her bag every six minutes to stare at herself and pose while Jay-Z was performing eighteen inches from us.” Radin writes that when Jay-Z left the stage, “Paris, who had been swilling straight vodka from (a) Grey Goose bottle for hours, gets up on stage, has the people in charge throw her ‘record’ on the house stereo for her to lip sync two of her songs. She gets up on the stage, pukes, leaves…” Radin adds, “I find the music business charming.”

traveller

actually, it won’t be as easy as it was with zahara. when zahara was adopted, they were mum about their relationship. that’s precisely why angie made a VERY BIG DEAL about adopting zahara as a single parent. if it had been proved that she was in a relationship with brad and they were adopting zee together, they would have been disqualified. brad and angelina are a proven couple now and would be recognized as such. homestudy would prove that they live in a domestic partnership and are not legally married. and even if they were legally married, they would have to be so for 2 years to adopt from india.

About the piece of garbage known as Life & Style, to say they are short sighted and headed for a fall is an understatement.

Even the people that loathe B&A because they’re die-hard fanistons don’t refer to L&S, they’re a humongous joke. The Sun Examiner has more cred.

It’s funny, about 2+ months ago - I wrote In Touch Weekly an e-mail after a particularly annoying negative story was written about B&A (can’t even recall it) and I told them that there was a movement to boycott magazines that regularly smeared and denigrated Brad & Angie - I told them point blank that there were millions of fans who were NOT BUYING their trash unless they attempted a more balanced way to present their trash. lol

Basically, I went on to say, their’s was a stupid and short sighted move, telling them their strategy was stupid, as the fanistons would buy the mag regardless of the headline on B&A….so it didn’t really matter with them whether it was/is positive or negative…I even said it was my feeling that MORE fanistons would buy their rag if the article was positive because they’d be so blinded with rage that they couldn’t resist.

But I let them know there was a concerted and ORGANIZED movement to boycott rags that trashed them from the millions of B&A fans all over the world.

I told them they had two choices, write nasty things and get boycotted or write things that aren’t nasty (it’s mostly lies anyway, positive or negative…but positive is better, lolol), and have BOTH camps buying their rag, I said. Why can’t they see that?

Oddly enough, or not - lol, In Touch has been more neutral on them and has even had a few positive stories. So when they do, I keep to my word and buy them.

I think I need to let L&S know the score as well.

Bottomline, the rags should think of B&A like a romance novel…their pairing is probably one of the most intriguing and romantic love stories I’ve seen in Hollywood history….they’ll be talking about B&A like they talk about ‘Burton & Taylor,’ or ‘Newman & Woodward,’ one day. I told them there was a REASON why romance novels were the #1 fiction genre in the world of publishing - people like happy endings, they like the idea that it’s POSSIBLE.

Stupidly, I told them - what they do every week…is step on, and wipe their shoe on, a REAL LIFE AMAZING romance - it’s such a bad move..it’s almost like they DON’T *WANT* to make money off these people. They have a choice to tell the truth, and even invent positive beautiful stories that capture one’s imagination…yet they choose to slam them and make this extraordinary reality, ordinary and trifling…not to mention stupid & unbelievable (’Brad is e-mailing Jen. Angie has had enough!’ - just one dumb example…courtesy of Huvaniston I’m sure)

I mean, who in hell wants to hear or read a romance where the hero, bored and dead inside with his life and then wife, falls passionately head over heels in love with another woman, then changes his mind constantly and thinks of going back to the ex, because though he was bored and dead, at least the house was quiet and uneventful, and the woman didn’t challenge him.

Oh yes…that sounds like an epic love story right there.

Where can I read more?!!

In short. L&S not only writes annoying and sometimes hateful things at times - they are really REALLY dumb. I pass them by everytime.

QQQQ Says:

November 22nd, 2006 at 10:04 am
not facts Says: November 22nd, 2006 at 10:01 am - read the last line… “it’s your call”

_______________________________

Yes, I read that, but that person is telling others to make a call based tabliod stories, not facts. The writer Angie Preggers wrote “somebody said about 6 weeks ago”. That person didn’t write the tabliods said about 6 weeks ago. I was point out that the “somebody” was the tabliods.

Meow Says:

November 22nd, 2006 at 11:11 am

Families with the three or more children cannot adopt in India

*******************

that’s another knock against them.

i’m not saying that they can’t pull strings and get special treatment, but in the face of their level of publicity and the backlash madge has let loose on the international adoption process, i think they’ll try to play by the rules as much as possible.

not facts Says: November 22nd, 2006 at 11:35 am - sometimes B&A fans take things way toooo seriously….. EVERYONE KNOWS what the poster posted came from the TABS….. when positive stories are written about them in the tabs, some fans believe it as….. therefore as the poster said, it up to YOU!!!!!

Lets just let it rest……..