Aniston’s Bing of a Boyfriend

i just get angered by her fans who blame everything that goes wrong in jens life on brad and angie.

Maybe 2007 will be a great year for jen… and thus, a great year for all three of them.

Jennifer Aniston is not God. The world is not supposed to stop if she is having bad day.

She tries to be chummy with everyone because that’s the only way she feels secure in herself.
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yeah, i agree. jen cant stand up on her own without the full support system of her so-called girfriends. she has co-dependent issue. she should continue seeing her shrink and totally admit this before she can completely heal.

Let’s call a Spade a Spade Says:

December 29th, 2006 at 12:37 pm
Let’s call a Spade a Spade (author)
December 7th, 2006 at 7:39 am

Access Hollywood stated that Vince and Jen broke up because Jen was too busy with her CHARITY work. Are you ******* KIDDING ME?!! This stupid ***** hosts dinner, wear a stupid t-shirt and appears on TV for like two minutes with a child she seemed uneasy hugging and that constitutes Charity work? MFG, what or who won’t she Blame for the misery that’s her life.

Blame parents marriage for her break-up
Blame TV for her crappy movie career
Blame Vince for smoking
Blame extentions for ruining her hair
Blame sexist writers for not getting good parts.
Blame Brad for the divorce
Now blame charity for her break up.

Until Jen understands she and only she is to blame for her life, she’ll always be miserable…even though she wears it well. And those people who say she owes no one an explanantion….GIVE ME A BREAK. If she had just kept her ******* mouth shut in the first place, the ***** won’t be facing a media onsluaght. Look at Reese, Nicole, Uma…women with CHILDREN who got divorced, they didn’t call a press conference and burst into tears as soon as the door opened. They accepted the divorce and moved on with their lives and they are better off. Of course Aniston is not in their caliber, she knew her mediocre talent won’t cut it so she decided to use her divorce as a gravy train to success. She gambled and she lost BIG TIME and that’s all there is to it. She literally opened the door for inquiries into her life, why does she feel the need to refute rumors? I’ll tell you why, she is too INSECURE to let things slide. God forbid people think Jen gained weight or God forbid people think she and Vince are no more. We can’t allow that coz Jen will not sleep at night. Her innate need to be seen in a good light is the reason she is in this predicament.

Oh all of a sudden, everybody hates Jen. Helloooo, until recently, every third post on every site or entertainment show was a negative story about Brad and Angie. They had their polls….who will last longer? Who is the better couple? Who is the better man? Who is the better actress? Who is the cutest couple….and every single poll, Jen and Vince won. They were catering to the delusional Jen fans and now they’ve turned on Jen, y’all are complaining.

And for the last time, Jen was with Vince before the divorce was final. The fact that she didn’t get pregnant does not make it any different. So if Brad committed Adultery, so did Jen. Jen fans think the rules don’t apply here. Of course the whole thing is a moot point because they were SEPERATED. Seperation is the first step to divorce. If couples waited until divorce was final before moving on with their lives, god knows where we’ll all be. Denise and Charlie just concluded their divorce and they’ve been dating other people. Let’s not forget Heather and Richie or Hilary Swank and Rob Lowe. Stop making excuses for Jen, she is a grown woman.

One last question for y’all, What was Huvane THINKING mailing Perez? He has not only admitted they READ blogs, he’s also admitted they CARE what an ordinary blogger writes. What is their excuse this time? Afterall, Perez is NOT CNN crawl? Pathetic fools!!! Bet she is hunched over her laptop reading all the comments about her and then calling Huvane, screaming “do something, do something. He called me Chinochio Maniston”.

An untrained monkey will do a better job than the **** Huvane is doing with his clients. Gwyneth Paltrow (Ms. Americans are dumb) Demi Moore (Ms. Robinson), Kirsten Dunst (will give Barney from The Simpson a run for his money, drinking wise). At leat these three do have talents, maybe if he stopped wasting time on the TV girl with delusions of grandeur, he could do more with the others.

I laugh when I read Leave Jen alone? Are we talking about 37yrs old Jen or 7yrs old Jen? Rotflmao, where were the pleas to leave Brad, Angie and their kids alone when blogger on this very site wished them dead, wished Angie had a miscarriage? I have been reading Jen’s thread since this debacle started and I have yet to see one person wish her dead. I bet your rationale is that Brad and Angie deserve the evil wishes but not Jen, oh no, not our dear Jen. You guys threw three little children under a bus for a 37yrs old and you felt no guilt whatsoever. So don’t come here and state leave Jen alone.

Jen Fans have excused her lies by saying she is paronoid, she does not know how to behave because everyone is watching her. Aniston’s paranoia is her own doing. If she would just be upfront about who she is, say this is me, take me as I am or go F yourselves, she would be much better off but nooo, she has to be America’s Sweetheart, which means she lives on people’s expectations and that’s why she will always be miserable. If there’s any lesson to be learnt from watching Aniston’s house of cards crumble it is this…LIVE FOR YOURSELF NOT OTHERS

i’m so sick of this fugly ******, and i am one that wishes that she would go away, get lost, go on hiatus, stop acting altogether (since she can’t act anyways!), get married, get pregnant, or something, maybe even move out of the country. just the way she carries herself, is all wrong. i thought as an actor, you don’t want the public to know alot about your private life, but this nutcase goes and constantly tells them everything. what is she STUPID! so your hurting, they dumped you, so go and take care of things privately, don’t bring the whole world into your hurt, and prey on it, just to be in the spotlight, and act like the world will still think that you are famous without bp. she did all of this wrong, very wrong, right from the start. poor old sap! i feel that she should meet angelina, it would be interesting; especially if they could say sorry, and be done with it. perhaps, they could even just let bygones be bygones, and move on with life; because jen now knows that she has lost brad for good, and that brad will never go back to her, now that he has his beautiful angelina and his 3 children. this is what he wanted, he’s happy, and extremely content. and, isn’t jen constantly saying that she has gotten over brad after these 2 years; so whats the problem with her meeting with angelina. jen needs to accept the fact, that she’s an EX now, and go and marry this BING guy, and get pregnant; since she’s always stating to the whole world, that she has always wanted to give birth to a child. i say, that this is what jen needs, and besides Bing is not that good looking of a guy, but NEITHER IS JEN; SO THEY WOULD DEFINITELY BE A GOOD MATCH! what was it that Rod Stewart’s daughter once said about jen, “MY GAWD, THAT JEN ANISTON IS REALLY A HOMELY LOOKING PERSON!” and, i will have to agree.

Let me state also that I do not pity all of them. The people like Reese, Jolie, Pitt, Depp, Clooney and a few others that do not take their celeb status so seriously. The people that know whether be family or other people, that there is more to life then making movies and being in the headlines.

bLEH! I just want to vomit! Enough of this moron!

Jen should take a break from Hollywood, move to a small town and live in obcurity like Demi did for like 2yrs. Then she comes back in full force and start producing movies, she has the money. I doubt this is gonna happen though, because Jen is afraid that people will forget who she is.

The Aniston Breasts: a gossip history

Sing it with me people…

So no one told you life was gonna be this way

Your job’s a joke, you’re broke, your love life’s DOA

(Can you hear Bill Kurtis’s deep voice?) In 1994, Monica, Ross, Joey, Phoebe, Chandler, and Rachel came into our living rooms every Thursday evening and changed our lives forever. The Central Perk became everyone’s favourite place to hang. Phoebe’s bad singing, Monica’s neurotic obsession with cleaning, Joey’s famous pick up line, and Chandler’s witty sarcasm entertained week in and week out. Those were the golden days, non? And then there were the nipples. RayRay’s permanently hard cherry nubbins on full display in every episode, no matter what she was wearing. Like a beacon in the night they called to us, mesmerized us, fascinated us, begging us to return to NBC at 8pm 24 times a year for 10 years. Coincidence or Conspiracy???

Fast forward to the year 2000. Same year she got married and lobbying for a role in Mark Wahlberg’s Rock Star in Phase 2 of the “I want to be a real actress in movies” Plan. Some photographers happen to get shots of her sunbathing topless (sound familiar?) in her backyard. She sues, she wins, the photos get locked away, but not before everyone started thinking about her titties. She got the part in the movie, by the way. Coincidence or Conspiracy???

And then there was Vanity Fair, circa 2001/2. Jennifer Aniston soaking wet in some flimsy shirt, nekked, but not really, every inch and contour of those gorgeous jubblies taunting us, inviting us, teasing us, campaigning for The Good Girl and Bruce Almighty. Coincidence or Conspiracy?

Flash to 2005. Jen is single, tired of being pigeon holed as a cry baby post divorce, eager to reinvent herself on the cover of GQ, wearing nothing but a denim skirt. Coincidence or Conspiracy?

Finally… Derailed flops at the box office. Her new movie, Rumour Has It, is in danger of getting stomped on by King Kong. Lo and behold, a photographer catches her flaunting those assets at her beach house – because Malibu is the most inconspicuous of all celebrity neighbourhoods. And once again, the international consciousness is riveted by the delectable prospect of her jubblies. Coincidence or Conspiracy???

This, my friends, has been a Lainey Gossip Breast Chronology. I hope you enjoyed it.

Vanity Fair sides with Aniston

Even if you aren’t a hardcore smutter, it would have been difficult to avoid the relentless hype about Jennifer Aniston’s Vanity Fair tell-all over the last few days. See photos from Jen-Fan.com. Leslie Bennetts, the biased cow who wrote the article, has appeared on every morning show/entertainment news program from here to Bora Bora hawking her fluff piece and trashing Brad Pitt and Angelina at every turn. You know gossips, we’re all entitled to our opinion. If given the opportunity, I’d LOVE the chance to sit nose to nose with Katie Couric and go to town on Jennifer’s pathetic PR strategy. But hey – I’m an internet hack. A SMUT lover. A nasty gossiping *****. I am NOT a contributing writer for a major publication (although I would gladly sell my soul for US Weekly) and I am certainly NOT a so-called respected journalist who used to call herself a f*cking New York Times writer! So before you fight me on this, read the article first. In its entirety. From top to bottom, read it all. Don’t just read the little snippets and excerpts from the news sites. Park yourself at Barnes & Noble or Chapters or in the longest line at the supermarket and read this ***** word for word. But whatever you do, don’t pay for it. Because when you’re done, you will see the disservice Leslie Bennetts has done Jennifer Aniston. Hellbent on portraying our favourite Fraud as the wounded wife, she has succeeded instead on presenting you with a picture of a woman who is painfully insecure, who cannot fight her own battles, who has clearly been coddled and pampered by the people around her, a woman who contradicts herself at every turn, and most importantly a woman who has made a critical error in allowing herself to be interviewed by someone who very obviously had a premeditated agenda. I don’t know what happened to poor Leslie Bennetts in her own personal life. Maybe she doesn’t like babies from Africa. Or maybe somewhere along the line, her husband saw her for the old hag she really is and took his ****** to more luscious pastures. Bottom line. This broad had an axe to grind and the results, in the long run, will be disastrous for boo hoo single Jenny. No one likes a cry baby. So go on with your pitiful self Jen. Looking forward to seeing you in 5 years when the only thing on your resume will be ‘Official Spokesperson the The Zone Diet’ (thanks to my girl Ammie for the brilliant description!)

REVELATIONS ABOUT JENNIFER

Jennifer Aniston begs for attention

Meanwhile, back in Frigid Fraud Aniston Land, things are decidely less cheerful. Camp Jen apparently relied too heavily on the post-separation p0pularity polls, when every bored housewife in America and that old delusional ****, Liz Smith, bought stock in the new no-Brad, no-Friends Jen. America’s Sweetheart will bounce back. The beloved Jennifer Aniston will enjoy a long career, even without her famous ex. Hmmm. How interesting. Six months later and it’s full scale panic. Mr & Mrs Smith is killing at the box office, Brad & Angie continue to do big business on newsstands while Aniston-related reports inspire little more than passing interest. Isn’t it bloody obvious by now that Jennifer Aniston became who she is/was by virtue ONLY of her marriage to the sexiest man alive??? So…desperate to save a campaign based primarily on post-divorce pity, Jen’s people are now scraping at the bottom of the barrel. My source says they’ve been bargaining their asses off, ‘They’re throwing Janice Min these stupid little tips, begging to put Jen in the magazine, in return for juicy stuff later on when she starts promotion for Rumour Has It. She never had to do this when she was with Brad. That was when she had it easy. Nowadays? No one cares!’ I guess this explains why every item on Jennifer Aniston these days has to do with how wonderful she’s doing and how great she looks and how she’s moved on and blah blah blah blah blah. But when you hear the same message over and over again, doesn’t it begin to stink of ‘rapidly aging has-been frantically trying to avoid obscurity??’ Yeah. I thought so. Anyway, let’s not waste any more time on leftover happy anorexics. I believe we have some fantasy sex to attend to. And when we left off, things were just getting started in the rub-a-dub.

The Aniston Backlash Begins

And thank Goddess! From my sources in Hollywood, word is the Pitt/Jolie media strategy is starting to pay off. The public is actually less and less opposed to seeing them together and less willing to buy the Jennifer Aniston ‘woe is me/I’m a victim’ routine any more. Why? Because the truth is, she is simply not that interesting. And breaking up with Brad Pitt left us with only HER. Without the glam hubby accessory, she literally is nothing. Says my insider: ‘She’s f*ckin’ boring. She doesn’t read, she doesn’t get out, she doesn’t volunteer. All she does is hang out with her friends and suntan. She’s not a total ***** or anything (Lainey: whatever…of course she is) but she’s just bleh…you know? And if you talk to her for 5 minutes, you get it. Inarticulate. No vocabulary. She’s a moron compared to Renee Zellweger and Julia Roberts and the power girls. Totally a different class.’ Very interesting stuff. And wouldn’t you know it - what do you think Jen was doing on Sunday? Hanging out at the Arquettes’ of course. Doing a bit of househunting. And…ta dah!…suntanning! Here she is, as vapid as ever, working on the ever present bronze glow. Oh … and did any of you get a chance to flip through US Weekly the issue before last? There is a gossip columnist named Paula Froelich who works for the NY Post. Very connected. She’s come out with a book called ‘It! 9 Secrets of the Rich & Famous That Will Take You To the Top’. Here’s #4, in her words: ‘GET GROOMED. Never underestimate the power of a pretty girl. Jennifer Aniston is of the plainest women in America and a testament to great stylists, makeup, and clothes.’ Oh snap! Plain! Did she just call her plain?? Man…we need to cue the starving cycle on the Aniston diet. The girl is gonna lose her mind!

Jen speaks

I hope the tide will finally begin to turn on the Pitt divorce mystery. Because up to this point, a primarily deluded fan-base has chosen to put their misguided affection for Jennifer Aniston before the truth…and before common sense. Obviously the intrigue of Brad’s alleged affairs is too titillating to ignore. And we all know, the tabloids need to sell magazines. Nothing could be more appetising to smut hungry masses than news of flirtation and possible infidelity between two of Hollywood’s hottest actors. Unfortunately for Aniston lovers, it would appear that poor little victim Jennifer had more to do with the breakdown of the marriage than any extracurricular activities on the part of her husband. Will you finally believe me when I tell you this girl is messed up?? Major insecurity issues. Major lack of self esteem. Possible eating disorder. Never feeling good enough. Wanting to be acknowledged as her ‘own person’. Very ambitious. Career before family. THESE are the very reasons behind the split. And if you don’t believe me…she tells you herself in a recent interview: ‘When your parents split up, it’s impossible to delude yourself about fairy tale romance and happy endings. Marriage actually brought up all the sorts of things I pushed on to the back-burner. Our marriage, like all marriages was rough and nasty at time. You just do the best you can. There is pressure on Hollywood marriages, but I don’t think it determines the death of your marriage. I am a total worrier and not good at hearing positive things. Brad’s a gentleman. He totally accepted me with all my dysfunction and struggles.’ So…now that we’ve cleared that up… Can we please let her ride off into the distance as a Hollywood footnote once and for all? Save your pity for someone who really deserves it…like Joaquin Phoenix (more on that later). For now, it’s time to give some serious investigative thought into the mysterious shroud surrounding Brad’s new

love life