OlderEllen to McCain on Same Sex Marriage: “Our Love Is the Same”
On today’s Ellen DeGeneres Show, the lesbian talk show host talked with Republican presidential nominee Sen. John McCain about their views on same-sex marriage and her plans to marry her partner, actress Portia de Rossi, this summer.
“I’m obviously excited and to me this is only fair and only natural,” Ellen said.
McCain said “people should be able to enter into legal agreements, and I think that that is something that we should encourage, particularly in the case of insurance and other areas, decisions that have to be made. I just believe in the unique status of marriage between man and woman. And I know that we have a respectful disagreement on that issue.”
“Blacks and women did not have the right to vote,” Ellen responded. “I mean, women just got the right to vote in 1920. Blacks didn’t have the right to vote until 1870. And it just feels like there is this old way of thinking that we are not all the same. We are all the same people, all of us. You’re no different than I am. Our love is the same. To me — to me, what it feels like — just, you know, I will speak for myself — it feels — when someone says, ‘You can have a contract, and you’ll still have insurance, and you’ll get all that,’ it sounds to me like saying, ‘Well, you can sit there; you just can’t sit there.’ That’s what it sounds like to me. It feels like — it doesn’t feel inclusive…It feels — it feels isolated. It feels like we are not — you know, we aren’t owed the same things and the same wording.”
Responded McCain, “Well, I’ve heard you articulate that position in a very eloquent fashion. We just have a disagreement. And I, along with many, many others, wish you every happiness.”
“Thank you,” joked Ellen. “So you’ll walk me down the aisle? Is that what you’re saying?”
“Touché,” McCain laughed.
“Well, my hope is someday it won’t be called a contract; it will be called marriage,” Ellen ended.
You can watch the video of Ellen and McCain here.
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98 Comments
McCain is wrong! because they all say this things because religion says it’s wrong! well again religion condoned slavery and women being put down by their husbands, and then we understood that that was wrong!
I totally agree with Ellen!!
In fact in 2006 they found the ‘gay’ gene, you are born that way, you don’t BECOME gay! that’s just who you are… and they should respect that, instead of having the church developing a vaccine! to CURE!! homosexuality!
I’m so glad the Supreme Court in CA change their minds!!! it;s amazing and I’m happy to live in this time in history!
I think people who talk trash and call other people names like “Christian freaks” and “ignorant” are the real hypocrites and ignorants. I thought EVERYONE was entitled to their own opinion. And everyone(!) includes conservatives and Christians. Just because their ideas don’t agree with yours doesn’t merit calling them disparaging names.
I don’t agree w/ same sex marriage. I’m happy McCain stood by his beliefs and stated them in a calm and respectful way. I also love Ellen, she’s such a great host. And I’m glad she is able to express her own opinions and views respectful. I can listen to her thoughts and ponder and understand some of her points. But I can also disagree w/ her overall view.
Come on people, we’re all grown-ups in a civilized era and society. Please don’t stoop down to calling people names just because they don’t agree w/ you.
i love ellen!!
i think it’s okay for us to disagree,you know.
we all have different opinions.
old old McCain, he’s dust. if he seriously becomes president, i can assure you tax and gas prices will skyrocket. its time my boys and i come back home. just cuz this old cracker may become the next president doesn’t mean he should ****** control our lives. we don’t have a say to get out at this point and have to do what we’re told!!! ****! its bad enough damn bush messed everything up and now he’s trying to cover up for his ***** by making Iraqis look bad. next target: IRAN. and they aren’t even ****** related to any of this pile of *****! nor was Iraq! people, please listen and open your eyes! PLEASE VOTE FOR THE DEMOCRAT PARTY!
oh and all you people who think we’re doing a grand job by staying at war; we’re not. we are forced to kill innocent civilians everyday. including women and children and old folks alive. DAMN i am so angry i seriously hope one day US gets the taste of a real war. then we’ll see how happy you are when you have to live in fear of dying every ****** day!
people don’t always believe what you read or hear in the news. its controlled by our gov. if you want the real deal, hit up the search engines online and you can find many actual footage and commentary’s done by the boys. we’re all miserable and many are downright getting sick and we just wanna come home and spend time with family and friends just like all your comfortable asses get to do. why should we have to be the ones to suffer? so please don’t vote for McCain!
Well done Ellen! I love her. I wish her all the best
Aaaaahhhh Ellen just shut up already! You got what you want for now. But i will say this . Marriage between two people of the same sex is no where near the same as marriage between a man and a woman. It also has no correlation between what went on with women and blacks in the past. It is stupid to even say that. I won’t go into the bible thing but for heaven’s sake God made Adam and Eve not Adam and Adam or Eve and Eve. So just shut up about being like everybody else, you can twist it and mess with it as much as you want ,it won’t make it right.
Gay marriage should be leagal all over the world. As Ellen said, love is all the same. I don’t think marriage has to be a man and a woman, that’s not what it’s about. Marriage is about loving someone and wanting to be with someone every day for the rest of your life. So we’re gonna discriminate homosexualls for wanting something that to us is obvious. This is just a waste of time, while people are starwing in the world and being killed in war, we’re sitting here discussing something that is a human right for everyone: To love your partner in a marriage wether or not your gay or straight!
Just a few things I’ve gotta mention here…
~bonnie… I hate to have to be the one to inform you, but your view on homosexuality seems to be a bit… well… misinformed.
First off…
Being gay is not the same thing as being transgendered. Gay men and women know what gender they are and where they stand without hesitation.
Secondly…
Being transgendered is not a matter of “Oh my god what gender am I???” it’s a matter of a person’s gender not matching their sex and being “born in the wrong body”.
~To those who are grossed out by gay sex…
Many glbts are pretty grossed out by the mere concept of straight sex.
~As far as McCain is concerned…
I fully respect his opinion and his stance on same-sex marriage. The problem I have with it is not in his beliefs, but with the fact that he has and will continue to allow his personal religious beliefs dictate how he has dealt with (and will continue to deal with) public policy. I hate to say this folks, but it seems that a lot of you have forgotten that our government is “for the people”. Presidents and legislators are not just for those who elected them, they’re supposed to protect the interests and rights of ~all~ American citizens whether their personal beliefs mesh or not.
And before anyone goes off the deep end and trots out the old standards, I’m talking about legal activity. (Also, while it may have been “illegal” a few years back, the law was deemed unconstitutional)
~To those arguing that it’s “a new time”… I don’t exactly agree with that assessment. GLBTs have been around since the beginning and haven’t always been shunned by society. Many cultures along they way respected (some even revered) members of the GLBT community.
Yes, I’m aware of the argument that claims all the civilizations that embraced homosexuality (to any extent) basically imploded. But it’s not accurate. For instance… Rome and Greece… they didn’t fall due to homosexual behavior, they collapsed because they were “true democracies” and therefore doomed from the start due to the nature of true democracies. Native Americans (and other aboriginal tribes around the world) were nearly wiped off the map in some places by outsiders who, fearing the unknown/difference between them deemed them savages and heathens because they weren’t Christians (yes, there were other reasons, but the Christianity aspect played a large role)
~Semantics plays a *huge* role in the discussion of matters such as same-sex marriage. Many get into arguments and refuse to consider semantic discussions without realizing that in discussions such as these, it is imperative that one knows exactly what they and their counterpart are talking about. To understand the meaning behind and connected to the words that we use in these discussions can, at times, make *all* the difference. Depending on where/how you live(d), your understanding of a word or concept can have an entirely different meaning for someone else and I believe that is what leads to many of the extremely heated debates that occur when talking about such sensitive issues. For instance, for one who considers themselves pretty religious, “marriage” may be nothing less than holy sacrament while someone who either isn’t the same religion or is not as “devout” may consider it to be both a religious rite and a legal contract (for lack of a better word at the moment) of sorts… while yet another may see it as strictly a legal contract between two individuals.
I agree with Ellen 100%.
I also think it has a lot to do with how you were brought up. If you were brought up in a religious Christian family, obviously Christian morals will “rule” your life, so to speak (do not take that literally). If you were brought up in a non-religious family on the other hand, you’ll be a lot more open-minded. That’s just the way it is.
I think everyone’s entitled to their own opinion. I personally think homosexuals should have the exact same rights as “the rest of us” (I don’t like saying that, because I do not think they are any different, love is love, what’s the difference?), but I that doesn’t mean I can’t respect the views and opinions of people who don’t agree with me.
I just don’t understand the problem. A religious Christian person (for example) believes that marriage is sacred and that it should be between a man and a woman. Then great, marry a man if you’re a woman, or marry a woman if you’re a man. Fine. But why is it your/their/anybody’s problem if a woman marries a woman, or a man marries a man? What’s that got to do with you or anybody but themselves? Really, they don’t mind you getting married, so why should you mind them getting married? That’s just strange to me.
To me, love is love, no matter what. If a man finds love to and from another man, then so be it. There is nothing abnormal about that. It’s simply two people getting along, finding support and friendship, love and compassion in one another, just as any couple. The fact that they’re both the same gender does NOT make them strange.
All I’m saying is that if you think homosexual marriages are wrong, then don’t marry someone from the same sex as you. But don’t let it stop others from marrying each other and showing their love to the world, just as you want to with yours.
And by the way, the only thing in the Bible actually “written” by God is the ten commandments. The rest was written by people. I do not mean to be disrespectful, but that’s the way it is.
I think that everyone has a right to there opinion on the issue. Christians must remeber that once before they were hated and oppressed and thought to be crazy. You dont have the right to deny others the right to get married because of your beliefs. Remember that the world goes throught different phases. Maybe in a 1000 years there we be a new religion and you will be oppressed again . what goes around comes around. For people who think that being gay is unnatural there are many spieces of animals that have homosexual relations (like dolphins for example). If God did not like the gay thing so much, the animals would not do that. You can not get more natural then that. But there are alot of people who will not listen or take the time to research these trues they are the ones that are ignorant and pig headed.
Go Ellen!
:]
Gee - I can ramble on most topic - but religion and homosexuality - I avoid these topics. I mean I have a lot to say, but I truly avoid these topics.
My fault of course !
To signature Bonnie:
That is so not the case. It’s not about being a man or a woman or both for that matter, it’s about loving someone in the same conditions!
I’ve never understood the objection to homosexuals or homosexual sex. I guess I’ve never understood it because I’ve always known I don’t have to participate in it if I don’t want to and because I believe that people should generally (as long as it doesn’t involve children, unwilling partners, partners incapable of making this kind of decision - etc.) do what is pleasurable to them. If it is not hurting you - and it’s not, because you’re not doing it and you don’t have to see it - why care so much?
As far as gay marriage goes, I figure if these people want to jump into the marriage pit and become part of the 50% of the failed ones, they are welcome to it! Again, why do you all care so much? A “feeling”? It’s a subjective feeling to an objective set of facts, the most interesting fact being that someone else’s homosexuality doesn’t affect you in any way, shape or form. It says nothing about your personal morality, which is the only morality you can rightfully be interested in.
And let’s talk about this “it’s unnatural” thing. It’s not unnatural. Our closest primate cousins engage in homosexual play and have long term homosexual relationships. So do some birds, worms.. you know, a bunch of animals other than us. (Here is a nice National Geographic link. http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2004/07/0722_040722_gayanimal.html
But you can do your own research, some of which is against thie thesis of the posted article.)
Since they are incapable of what we consider thought, it must mean that - guess what - their actions are NATURAL. And what do you mean when you say it is “unnatural”? Do you mean that it is “artificial” that it is not a real choice on the part of the people making it to be in a sexual and romantic relationship of someone of the same sex? How do you know? You’re not making the decision or experiencing the pleasure. You have no objective basis for these claims you are making.
But again, natural. So, it was natural for me to be drawn to boys. In fact, I was drawn to boys so early on, that it never occurred to me to be attracted to girls. I didn’t make a decision to be attracted to boys - it came “naturally.” But that same desire came naturally for my cousin, Ricky. Ricky (Richard) loved boys too! So early on that it could not possibly have been a decision he made. It was NATURAL. Just like I’ve always liked boys, Ricky has always liked boys. (And no, he wasn’t molested by some older relative, teacher, church elder or anything like that. The dude just liked boys from the time he knew there was anything to like about them. How is that unnatural? If your sexuality is within you - which I argue that it is - how can its expression be unnatural? I’m not saying that it can’t be twisted or perverted by abuse in some cases - but this can’t be true of all the gays worldwide, can it? Of course not. So explain - where does it come from, this desire in very young children to be with one sex or the other?
And let’s talk about sin. I happen to be an atheist and therefore don’t believe in sin per se. I am a moral person and I live by what is called the “Golden Rule” - basically do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Fine. What is all this Christianity if you cannot live by its basic tenets? You know that someone else’s sin does not become your sin. If you believe that this is a sin, err on the side of justice and let them sin and give account for it to whatever god they worship. What does it have to do with you and your relationship with your god? Again - all this interference for no good reason. Just do you.
And frankly - and I hope any gays posting to this don’t take this the wrong way, which is usually a sign that the person is about to make some statement that’s biased or bigoted, which this is, but in a “positive” way - gays make good neighbors. The property values rise. Violent crimes in neighborhoods with a high percentage of gays generally decline faster. I’m not saying that they’re all sweetness and light - like any population, you have your jackasses and evil people - but listen… Gays have been with us this whole time. They are not going away. They are not bad people. As a matter of fact, you are related to one, probably more closely than you realize. It baffles me truly, deeply and honestly baffles me why people care so much about someone else’s sexuality.
I love Ellen, and detest Portia. But I wish them all the best. I want them to have a beautiful wedding and a wonderful marriage. BTW, “marriage” is whatever we want it to be. That’s the great thing about language: it can encompass whatever the speakers of it want it to encompass. I decided that this word, “marriage” encompasses two men or two women who want to get married. I’m dropping “gay marriage” from my personal lexicon, because it’s duplicative. Thanks.
Amen Merry…
Gay marriage is abnormal, immoral, and downright disgusting.
Jen DC get a life loser!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jane you are the ignorant one here. It is 2008 but doesn’t mean we are going to accept homosexuals, perverts, pedophiles, prostitutes and all the other evil and call them normal and give them rights! You are sick!
Here is a story about McCain and his FIRST wife that I doubt will appear in any US publication. Devastating, I would say.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1024927/The-wife-John-McCain-callously-left-behind.html
SEPARATION OF CHURCH AND STATE PEOPLE!!!!!!
Some people say “being gay is a moral sin.” Yes, your RELIGION believes it is a moral sin. However, America is not a theocracy and not everybody here is Christian or Catholic or whatever religion you are. In America, or in the America we are supposed to live in, Church and State are separate, therefore just because one persons particular religion believes something is wrong or a “moral sin” does not and CAN not mean that that particular something should be outlawed. The bible says that eating shell fish is a moral sin, so should eating shell fish be outlawed? No, we would all find that utterly ridiculous. But according to some uneducated and ignorant people in the U.S, our laws should be based off of the bible. Thus, according to their standards, eating shell fish should be outlawed, along with all the other ridiculous laws written in the bible.
Open your eyes people. Everyone deserves equal protection under the law, so why should the law discriminate between heterosexual and homosexual couples? The law does not discriminate, only people do. We do not have a right to impose our particular religion’s morals onto the rest of society.
I hope you all realize in your hearts the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered people are all still PEOPLE and deserve the same rights as every other American.
Ellen states “We are all the same people, all of us. You’re no different than I am. Our love is the same.”
Ok, i agree with her when she says that we are all the same people, cuz we are! But when she states that “our LOVE is the same”… that kinda gets me. I Dont belive her love for Portia is the same love i have for my “mate.” The love is different between a man and a women compaired to the love betwwen a women and a women or a man and a man. The fact that I know i can have kids and my partner is the father and not some “sperm doner” is a different kind of love all by its self. The fact that i can get married to my (male) partner and not have people lookin at us everytime we walk out of our house is a wounderful feeling!! Gay/lesbian couples are NEVER gonna know what that feels like…
all you ***** really piss me off.
seriously who are you to judge and discrimate against people.
and if your christian only God can.
so use ur frkn brains if u even have any.
pathetic *******.
hypocrites writing complete ****.
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