OlderDavid Letterman’s Top Ten On Sarah Palin
David Letterman poked fun at Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin during Wendesday night’s episode of The Late Show With David Letterman. (Last week, he bashed presidential hopeful John McCain for skipping his show.)
Last night, the 61-year-old late night talk show host rattled off the “Top Ten Things Overheard at Sarah Palin’s Debate Camp”. Of course, the audience reaction was huge. Check them out for yourself:
10 — “Let’s practice your bewildered silence”
9 — “Can you try saying ‘Yes’ instead of ‘You betcha’?”
8 –” Hey, I can see Mexico from here!”
7 — “Maybe we’ll get lucky and there won’t be any questions about Iraq, taxes, or health care”
6 — “We’re screwed!”
5 — “Can I just use that lipstick-pit bull thing again?”
4 — “We have to wrap it up for the day — McCain eats dinner at 4:30″
3 — “Can we get Congress to bail us out of this debate?”
2 — “John Edwards wants to know if you’d like some private tutoring in his van”
1 — “Any way we can just get Tina Fey to do it?”
To watch Letterman deliver this Top Ten list, visit CBS.com.
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81 Comments
Oh Letterman! How do I love thee? Let me count the ways…
LOL @ 10.
This man is genius.
Jared you amaze me every time. You’re so pathetic in your liberal spin. One this is a celeb blog site, Sarah Palin is not a celeb. Two you prove to show your hatred for Mrs. Palin everytime you post about her. Have I ever seen a David Lettermen top 10 before? Nope. So please stop being so one sided….either post either way…or don’t post about it at all.
Now, he should do a top 10 of Biden..oh wait…hes a Democrat so he won’t …..the media is so incredibly biased.
This is just a guess but I take it JUST JARED is voting for Obama??? This is the last time I will be visiting this site.
Yep bridget, we will not see anything like that. Not to mention just scrolling down the page I see bruce is headlining a obama rally….so we got Jared posting David lettermans top ten and then postive spin on Obama…that’s just on the first page.
Newsflash, kiddies. You don’t like to like every post here but to be an uptight jackhole because you don’t agree with the blogger’s political leanings is hypocritical. So everybody else can have opinions but not someone who provides you entertainment?
I don’t know Jared from a hole in the wall, but based on the posts, I’m going to guess gay man. Of course he’s voting for a Dem. Don’t be so closed minded.
Whatever, it was hilarious!
Hey “BUBBANESS” Ummm….who is being close minded? Those in the media that only post items that give THE DEMS a postive spin, or those of us that tire of hearing only ONE SIDE????
Apparently there are a lot of things that you don’t know from a hole in the wall.
i’m surprised Letterman hadn’t hit her in a top ten list already.
http://celebritytoday.today.com/
*chuckles*
I’m so sick of Sarah Palin!
Oh Letterman!!! HILARIOUS…I wish I was American for just the day so I can VOTE in this election!!!!!!!!!!!! Incredible.
Right on……..
There are ENDLESS jokes about Sarah Palin because she is uninformed, inexperienced, ignorant, intolerant, too conservative and has no business running for V.P. of this country.
America! wake up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh Letterman - you are the greatest!!!
paul, your words are falling on deaf ears. Stop. Save yourself. That is what I do.
Letterman is too funny. No, he isnotLiberal. he is a comic and will and has gone after any politician, himself or entertainer. That is wht comics do.
The real joke is on us…BECAUSE NOV. 5 , PRESIDENT McCAIN and Vice President PALIN will run this country for the next three years. They will serve THE ALMIGHTY AND ALRIGTY REPUBLICANS. Country is second. Republicans Party heads are first andtheir agenda. It is all about power baby. PRESIDENT McCAIN will DIE in OFFICE due to old age and Vice PRESIDENT PALIN WILL BE THE PRESIDENT PALIN!!!!!
JOKE IS ON US!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ha! Sarah Palin IS entertainment! She has proven that many times in many ways. Be sure to watch her in tonight’s debate- it should prove to be entertaining for sure! I betcha!
lol
gOOD STUFF THAT WAS HILARIOUS!
i don’t get why people say this woman is attractive.
To people with a brain he is not worth two cents.
Hollywood liberals, Lots of Money, No Brains.
Sad thing is that despite this is a joke from late nite comedy show, I DO 100% honestly believe that Tina Fey would do a better job………… very scary for American
Your Neighbor from Canada
Couric: Let me get your take, if I could Gov. Palin, on a number of social issues. Because that’s, they’ve gotten some attention, your position. If a 15-year-old is raped by her father,you believe it should be illegal for her to get an abortion. Why?
Palin: I am pro-life. And I’m unapologetic about my position there on pro-life. And I understand good people on both sides of the abortion debate. In fact, good people in my own family have differing views on abortion and when it should be allowed. So … I respect people’s opinion on this.
Now, I would counsel to choose life. I would like to see a culture of life in this country. But I would also like to see taking it one step further. Not just saying I am pro-life, and I want fewer and fewer abortions in this country. But I want, then, those women who find themselves in circumstances that are absolutely less than ideal, for them to be supported for adoptions to be made easier. For more support given to foster parents and adoptive families. That is my personal opinion on this.
Couric: But, ideally, you think it should be illegal …
Palin: If you …
Couric: …for a girl who was raped or the victim of incest to get an abortion?
Palin: I’m saying that, personally, I would counsel the person to choose life, despite horrific, horrific circumstances that this person would find themselves in. And, um, if you’re asking, though, kind of foundationally here, should anyone end up in jail for having an … abortion, absolutely not. That’s nothing I would ever support.
Then, now, some may characterize my position as being extreme, because I am pro-life … and I want women empowered to know that, you know, we can help them. They can be strong enough, and they can have the resources provided them to give that child life.
The extremism, to me, is those who would support partial-birth abortion. Those who would disallow parental consent when it comes to a minor child who would seek an abortion. I think parents should have a say in that. They should be a part of their child’s health care there. And those who, like Barack Obama, would support measures that would actually allow in a botched abortion, late-term abortion, that child being born alive, to allow it to not receive medical help to save that child’s life. That’s extremism to me. That is so far on the left side of the political spectrum and public sentiment in this country. That’s the extremism to me.
Couric: So you want more support so women have more options, or girls have more options. But you also think it should be illegal, that there should be no punishment if a woman does break the law…
Palin: I would like to see more women given more support so that those of us who say, “You know, a culture of life is what we believe.” Is best … for human kind, you know, to respect the sanctity of every human life. And to understand … that we live in a pretty messed up world sometimes.
When you consider what’s going on in this world. The most promising and good ingredients in this world … is a child. The hope that a child brings. And just understanding that. Being near and dear to my heart. I want to do all that I can to reduce the number abortions.
And to usher in that culture of life. And in my respect for the other side of this issue, I have not spoken with one woman who do, may disagree with me on, when abortions could or should be allowed, not one woman has disagreed, as we sit down and rationally talk about … the common goal we have, and that is to see fewer and fewer abortions. And to provide more and more women support in this world.
Couric: Some people have credited the morning-after pill as for decreasing the number of abortions. How do you feel about the morning after pill?
Palin: Well …I’m all for contraception. And I’m all for any preventative measures that are legal and safe and should be taken. But, Katie, again and we can go round and round about the abortion issue, but I am one to seek a culture of life. I am one to believe that life starts at the moment of conception. And I would like to see …
Couric: And so you don’t believe in the morning-after pill.
Palin: I would like to see fewer and fewer abortions in this world. And, again, I haven’t spoken with anyone who disagrees with my position on that.
Couric: I’m sorry. I just want to ask you again. Do you not support or do you condone or condemn the morning after pill?
Palin: Personally, and this is isn’t McCain-Palin policy …
Couric: That’s OK. I’m just asking you.
Palin: But, personally, I would not choose to participate in that kind of contraception. It …
Couric: Do you think it should be illegal?
Palin: I don’t think that it should necessarily be illegal. But we can go, again, round and round. And what the foundation I believe of this debate, of this discussion, even of your questions, is do you believe in the sanctity of life? Are you are you gonna side on the pro-life position or not when decisions are in front of you and you have to make them? Now, as a vice president, what positions would a vice-president have to take on the abortion issue? They’re not legislating. A vice president does not make law.
Couric: But if you have a moral problem with abortion, it seems to me you would do everything in your power to make it illegal and overturn Roe v. Wade and …
Palin is dumb as a box of rocks.
# 18
boo @ 10/02/2008 at 1:00 pm
i don’t get why people say this woman is attractive.
********************************
I don’t either, boo boo.
She is just a woman with a fake tan, and make-up. Nothing special.
He sould do a biden top ten and say the same question 10 times. Who was the President during the depression and was tv even envented before the depression. Biden would fail on both of those questions because he is an incredible bonehead.
Sarah Palin is beautiful. I would love to see the people who are knocking her down. They must be some real beauties.
Sarah will mop the floor with biden. No class, no brains, nobama.
Biden is as dumb as a box of rocks. obama is an empty suit with NO experience.
Obama’s tax hikes will KILL an already shaky economy. We can’t afford Obama/Biden.
letterman doesn’t write those himself, morons. that’s what us interns are for.
‘;brilliant.
..david got funny writers.
`palin’s as dumb as a bag of dirty-pennies.
Barak is an elitist. He thinks he is better than everybody. Michelle hates America.
Jamie - I hope his interns write a Biden Top 10. Oh that will never happen.
Sarah has more experience than obama and biden combined. I think obama will have rev. wright as his Secretary of State, and william ayres as his Defense Secretary.
Freaking hilarious. I can’t wait to watch her fail miserably at the debate tonight. I almost feel sorry for her, but then again, she “didn’t blink” . . . .
Look
#34 -
Are you a bit slow? Maybe someone should teach you how to define experience, and perhaps you should actually watch Sarah Palin speak (or make a brave attempt to). Her interviews with Katie Couric are extremely revealing of just how little this woman actually knows, and its honestly alarming just how many people are willing to defend her. Just because she seems relatable to a lot of people does not mean she would be a good VP, or God help us, president if something happened to McCain (he is older than time itself, after all). She is recently quoted as having said:
“It’s time that normal Joe Six-pack American is finally represented in the position of vice presidency.”
Wait, what? Because having that kind of individual represented in the position of president isn’t enough? Hasn’t this country realized yet, after eight years of Bush, the financial crisis and more problems than we can count that you shouldn’t vote for the guy that you’d rather have a beer with? Has history taught you people nothing? WAKE UP!!!!
TO ” BE 123 “……THANKS!!!…..TO LETTERMAN. ” THANKS “….LOL.LOL
Couric: Well, explain to me why that enhances your foreign-policy credentials.
Palin:
Well, it certainly does, because our, our next-door neighbors are foreign countries, there in the state that I am the executive of. And there…
Couric: Have you ever been involved in any negotiations, for example, with the Russians?
Palin:
We have trade missions back and forth, we do. It’s very important when you consider even national security issues with Russia. As Putin rears his head and comes into the air space of the United States of America, where do they go? It’s Alaska. It’s just right over the border. It is from Alaska that we send those out to make sure that an eye is being kept on this very powerful nation, Russia, because they are right there, they are right next to our state.
The media??? Are you kidding? This is one person’s blog. And you nitwits think that posting Letterman’s top 10 list on a blog is evidence of media bias? Wow. Just… wow.
Don’t let the door hit you in the **** on the way out #5.
To #28
Obama is an empty suit with NO experience huh? So what does that make Palin? An empty bikini with a rifle on the hip??
Your idiocy is astounding and it’s people like you who are ruining this country dumbass.
BOO Sarah Palin!!!!! Obama/Biden 08
Hilarious list and yet here are people actually supporting this Palin twit!?!? Good god….how pathetic and how sad for them.
To all you alleged Conservatives who don’t know what the word means. What ‘liberal’ media do you Ditto-heads keep referring to? The mysterious ones your Chickenhawk leader Rush Limbaugh tells you?
Some of the dumbest statements have left the mouths of George W. Bush, John McCain and Sarah Palin in modern US and World history.
If some wingnut who suggests a knowledge of Russia based on being able to seeing the Siberian treeline then that would mean all of you are just plain Dumb.
Its no wonder that your candidate of choice comes from the profits of selling Budlight to a bunch of BudLites. Take a real good look at those Anheuser-Busch commercials, that’s how Budweiser is calling you dumb while laughing all the way to its French-speaking Belgium bank.
There is no such thing as a ‘liberal’ media that would have the influence your fantasies attach to it. Big media are firmly conservative in the corporate boardroom and advertising offices that generate the real revenue.
dandeejam @ 10/02/2008 at 11:33 am
My point was that Just Jared is not “the media”. It’s a gossip blog. I’m sure your conservative self would be more than entertained if there had been an anti-Obama Top 10 list posted because it serves your delicate sensibilities instead of offending them.
To all the Conservatives who monitor blogs with Dittohead cliches waiting for opportunities to post.
Alaskans voted Sarah Palin to be governor in the same way Minnesotans vote for Jesse Ventura, as a satirical protest against career politicians by essentially showing that anyone else could do a better job. There’s a lesson in this. Never concede 4 years of office to a Fool just to make a point against the government. There’s not a single Alaskan, including Sarah who thought that the stupid and proven incompetent Republican Party would come along and chose her to be a running-mate for VP! This is a joke gone bad for very serious reasons.
Since 1980, you have beenm voting certified Dumbasses to represent the White House beginning with Reagan. Funny how you are always condemning Hollywood and the ‘Liberal’ press when its you who keep electing actors and models for high office.
If its any consolation to you, Sarah will do fine against Biden only because ignorance makes an effective debating weapon against a pompous know it all. Sarah Palin’s ignorance will so enrage Biden that he will lose his temper and thereby lose the debate. that has to be the plan the Republican’s are using and Sarah knows how to play it well.
Its not Biden who will lose or Obama if McCain wins on Nov. 4, but the USA and the World.
How many disasters of your elected Bush League will it take for you to get a clue? 911? Katrina? Iraq? Wall St Meltdown? It just geeps getting worst and worst. All you need do is look into the mirror for the blame so-called Conservatives.
And by the way, you are not real Conservatives. Most of you don’t know the definition of the word you are just the Parrots taught to repeat what you hear that makes you feel good about yourselves.
You are just feeding on your delusions.
On Obama having a Top Ten List.
He’s a true Harvard grad with distinction. So there’s no dumb moments that could make a list compared to the Affirmative Action legacy candidates you prefer. Bush and McCain could not have gotten into Yale or Annapolis without their family legacies and would have flunked out. Of course you believe they just were rebels who loved to party and could pull it together at will instead of the truth that they are airheads.
One good thing is that Blonds have been redeemd by the stupidity you present to the USA and World as your choice of candidates for the White House and Nuclear Arsenal.
See Conservatives
The truth about Hillary and Bill Clinton, Barack Obama and Joe Biden are that they are truly brilliant. it doesn’t matter about whether you agree with their policies, the point is that they truly represent the ‘best and brightest’ of the nation. While the people you prefer are the dumbest but born of privilege where they have slummed their way through life assured they will get important posts due to their family not any merit on their own.
Most of you have absolutely nothing in common with Bush or McCain but are in fact working stiffs yourself who better toil or you will not get what you need to live. Could you afford to coast in school like McCain or Bush? Were you born in a family of privilege that guaranteed you a million-dollar job regardless your qualifications?
The Clintons and now the Obama’s are rich because of how hard and smart they worked. In that way they are like most Americans who just took advantage of the opportunity to improve themselves.
Bush and McCain are slackers. Since you love to identify with them so much I must conclude you are slackers too.
Its no wonder that China, Japan and even Thaliand and Korea have in fact advanced beyond us only most of you are still clueless and deluded on American greatness. The USA is a reflection of you dummies calling yourselves ‘Conservatives.’ You got us into this mess based on being hypnotized by the Rush Limbaugh’s of the nation.
Obama is not on the Top Ten List because he has not done ten dumb things to qualify for it.
Realize
Sarah Palin can only be compared to other Governors and VP running mates of the major parties. In the same way Nancy Pelosi can only be compared to other Speakers of the House.
As Nancy Pelosi is the most gorgeous Speaker in the history of the USA so to is Sarah Palin one of the most attractive governors in the USA as well as VP candidate of one of the 2 major parties.
If she becomes President due to a McCain victory and his inability to finish the term she will become the ‘Most Beautiful President’ in US history.
Now if you compare her to women in general, well not so good.
I just hope she crashed in flames.She’s so ridiculous.Can anybody in his/her right mind see her as President of the USA with all the problems we are having?.Reeeally.
Well, to all the conservative losers whining on here, your tired old crap of ‘the media is libel and biased’ is KNOWN to be untrue… why not visit one of the MAJORITY of the media sites or stations that spout right wing crap and stay there. Have you EVER visited Fox and complained that they are too right wing? I did not think so. Get over yourselves and get used to being in the minority….
Change is coming (REAL change, not the fake ‘borrowed’ crap that McPain is spouting)… can’t wait for OBAMA’08… thank God… no more conservative government to f*ck the country up like they have done over the past 8 years!
i can’t believe a party once headed by Abraham Lincoln also gives rise to Bush and now Palin. i know republicans have good policies and can be good people. i just don’t see these good republicans. maybe john mccain was once, before he threw it all away for a crack at the presidency. don’t even get me started on the so-called left. no wonder people are so desponded by politics. i was really hoping for change from Obama but now I am not too sure. it’s the same old song.
(sorry for the rant, watching the news the past couple of days really depresses me-i can’t believe Bill O’Reily has a show!)
OLD, OLD, Bitter Dave. He is so afraid of Sarah.
it’s funny, even as a mccain supporter. However let’s never forget that letterman doesn’t write any of this, when the writers were on strike dave was off the air, so congrats to who wrote this for him, it’s unfortunate they didn’t go after obama with the same type of material, I can go over a quick top 10 for obama.
10. hope they don’t mention terrorists, obamas friends with them.
9. hope they don’t mention the church, rev wright might want to speak.
8. my wife, what wife? we all love america, well since i’ve been chosen.
7. i took alot of money from the crooks on wall street, oops wait i did? oh yeah I did…………….
man she really is dumb scares me how mccain choose her as a vice president
Biden Lost BigTime. (not surprised)
Wow, no wonder things are going with you. People looked up so much on you Americans - you have been blessed and gifted but seems you are deteriorating - yes - there is so much freedom of expression - hope you wake up now in your slumber. You should treasure your God fearing leaders. Wake up American people and vote properly.
Letterman hit it. Notice the debate when Senator Biden chocked up, after speaking about his injured son. Sarah Palin played Ms. Roboto. No emotion, no pause, just “John MCain………..” Oh yea ,well scripted babe, trained just like a mutt.
i don’t know what all you republican a**holes are talking about. this is some funny sh*t.
#57 - What debate were YOU watching?? Biden was the clear winner.
i love number 9, she always says ” you betcha~” she just said it during the debet
American’s that try to find something significantly wise in Sarah Palin make me feel sorry for them.
My respects to McCain, but Palin… hahaha..
The American people voting for that!… is just more evidence of the country becoming more and more populist. All about appearances!… But hey.. she’s gorgeous!…. hahaha.. GOOD LUCK!
David Letterman…one RICH and INFLUENCIAL BULLY!! And I don’t think he’s funny! Is everyone still laughing?
@cOGECO:
I’m so glad you can’t vote in any of our elections.
We have enough American born morons voting.
@Debbie:
You are one silly *****. check for fibroid tumors.
@yoyo:
You are a great argument for retroactive abortion.
@blackfriday1978:
Dolt. If it weren’t for hockey and beer. Canada would be the world’s largest and coldest mental institution.
@boogie:
You must be a boogie.
@nicole:
Because they are not homos.
@realize:
And you are as clever as a cowpie.
@realize:
And you are as clever as a cowpie.@James Mason Fan:
How about in a homosexual fantasy way.
@[☆I n F a m o u s☆]:
I bet you are as ugly as you are stupid.
@giselle:
I bet your IQ doesn’t make it to three digits. Boy are you dumb.
@BlueStatenj:
Being instructed fromrm some dim bulb from New Jersey. Look who they elect for example Lautenberg. Morons.
@darb:
I’m sorry but you are a simple minded dolt.
Well now lets see if Dave will speek about his wife she had a baby and was not married. Would that make her a **** or a *****? If Dave bought her dinner before the doing the dead that would make her a *****, if they just screwed in the back seat I think that would make her a ****. What of the child is it a ******* or a love child by wrong doing parents? David it would be nice to hear your take on this. Oh yes this is said as a joke, Dave is it funny?
Someone please defend poor dave, It’s not nice to see an a s s h o l e Like him ask hard question. He will never be ask these question on the air but it would be nice to hear a reply 0f 77 questions
Would people be offended if David said “The mother of our President was kocked-up”. Yes, as we should be. I guess it just matters “who you are”. As a woman I am outraged at the term Knock-up, especially when it is used in contects with a 14 year old. Come on people. Have we lost all morals. David Letter like Imas should be fired. He is a grown man. He should be held responsible for his words. And we should scream “bloody muder” until he is.
@realize:
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and besides she is not in a beauty contest. She is much smarter that you or I, and especially Letterman.
@Kalilah: Letterman doesnt write these things. He has the power to not say them ,though. HES half funny and half smart-ass………………and gets away with it…………..called……………freedom of speech…I went to school with guys like him.. He starts trouble and sits back and watches.
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